my.life.my.indulgence

Happy.MAD.Neutral

2009-11-20T16:06:00.003+08:00

Hello all, I have no mood to talk much. Enough to say that I had a mixed feelings today.

Noon: HAPPY MOOD.
I just finish my very final paper for my first degree. Finally.

Afternoon: MAD MOOD.
I just break off my friendship with this girl. And this is my very first time to do thing like this. Yes, I never have EX-FRIEND before this. But, today I did it and I'm not regret it because as what she said, I'm such a VERY BAD friend.
Owh, don't ask me because I'm don't even remember her name anymore. I've deleted everything associated to her. Because I can't never be friend with a VEEEERRRYYYY-NICE-plus-BERHATI-MULIA's people.

Now: NEUTRAL MOOD.
Finally I can manage to neutralized my mood level after having talk with Anis. Owh yes, Anis has been experienced this feelings before, but as always, Anis is a kind hearted girl who can forget everything and be friend with that girl again. Me? Naaaaahhh..

Excuse me? Did I heard people talking about me there? Never mind, I just take it as "cengkerik" sounds.

p.s. For those who wanna know the very truth of the story, do reach me through my phone. I'll tell everything.
p.p.s. Don't have my phone number? I take that as you are not my very close friends. Sorry.
p.p.p.s. I talk about my very final semester in UUM later.

Zipping mouth.

2009-10-26T16:17:00.003+08:00

I'm feeling miserable. Like having butterflies in my stomach. My heart is like to burst out. I feel like crying. I feel like punching people's face. I feel like screaming to everyone if it is the only way for me to release this pain.

Blog is always a place for me to let go those feelings which I can never speak it out by my own mouth. I don't know where should I share my feelings. I won't disturb LOVE because I know he is also in the midst of extreme stress due to the job. I won't talk to my family because there might seen this thing as a normal ordinary thingy. Or maybe it is. Maybe I'm the one who complicate it.

In appearance, this is really not my problem. At all. But it will give subsequent effect to the person I loved the most. I hate that to be happened one day. This is me. I cannot just sit and see all bad things happened. I will always interfere as I thing that I have responsibility to talk, or maybe to advice as far as I can. I'm doing all of this with no reason. For me, everything I do must always be with reason and knowledge. With only that I can see the way of life clearly.

This is never be a problem for me if I am dealing with the person below my level or maybe same age with me. But, a problem arise when I am dealing with the person whose in the upper level than myself. I have to talk in good manner.

I won't be seen as a rude person. I want people to see me as a helper. I try to help. Helping is actually comes in various ways. By talking, listening, advising, anything can be. I face with one situation where me, myself as a normal person see this as a problem. If it is not a problem now, I believe this thing will create a problem one day in the future.

This situation involves a person who actually very close to my life. And that's why I couldn't talk to anyone. It is like spitting to the air where actually it will fall on my own face. So, I decide to keep it with me.

Having said that, I try to personally talk to this person. Within our conversation I swear to God that I didn't even use any harm words. I talked and advised in a good manner. I keep all my anger inside. I just let go all nicest words during the conversation. With the hope that I can try to solve the problem before it turn to be a big problem.

I know this person felt touch at heart before it is me to talk. Who am I to talk like that? Where is my level? I have no rights to talk. Maybe, these were the questions that appeared in this person's mind. Maybe. Who might knows?

Our conversation ended with no solutions. This person seem cannot take all my words. At last, I am the one who felt guilty. I felt like violation of level of life. So, I took it as my fault for not knowing my appropriate level. I apologized to this person. Yes, I did. I cross my fingers.

But today, I received a text messages. That person, the one whose I talked to before, was upset and said I was only pointing my fingers without knowing the truth story. That person said I am like crossing the line. I have no rights of talking what I have said before.

And because of this stupid person, I feel miserable now. Why am I the one who is guilty in this case? When actually this case or situation doesn't really implied myself.

I talk to myself. I will take it as my fault of over the limit by talking like that to the person who is in the upper level than me. Yes. I'll take it. But, I promise myself after this if anything ever happen to that person, I will only watch it from far. I will never step in that person's problem ever. Never. That is my promise.

p.s. Buat baik salah. Buat jahat lagi lar salah. It's okay. I'm zipping my mouth now.

Mango's Game

2009-10-24T09:25:00.006+08:00

Mangosteen is one of my favourite blog. I am the silent reader of this blog. I love arts even though I'm not that creative person.

I just notice that Mangosteen contest this morning as I do some blogwalking. All we have to do is to name any object under the sky that we wish to see in the form of stamp. Just anything. Easy rite?

For the winning prizes, Mangosteen is giving a set of 9 mini handcarved eraser stamps and also the personalized stamp (the one that we wish to see as I mentioned above).

I want to enter this contest.

As my family and close friends know, I love Hello Kitty so much. So, sis Mangosteen I wish to see Hello Kitty stamp. I put two sample photos below:

Name: Hello Kitty with Cupcake
Rationale: I just learned baking..!! And I love it..!!

Name: Hello Kitty with stationery
Rationale: I'm in the mood of final exam. So, that's it!

Opps!! Actually sis Mangosteen tak suruh pon letak picture and reason. Tapi I degil, I nak letak jugak. Senang sis Mangosteen nak visualize kan. Baik kan I. hehe...

That's all. I hope I will win!!

Love you sis Mangosteen!!!

p.s. Ada nada-nada membodek di situ. Haha!!
p.p.s. Eh! I nie memang tak mengikut peraturan kan. Sis Mangosteen kate letak satu jer daripada 3 gambar kat atas tue. But I letak jer semua. Sorry sis! I excited! LOL.

Late Nite Post.

2009-10-22T00:00:00.005+08:00

Hye all. Selamat Hari Raya. LOL.

I just woke up. It is 12.10 a.m. Believe it or not. Actually I slept at 8.00 p.m. due to migraine. I took a painkiller pills then zzzz.

LOVE called then I answered the phone, have a little chat, laugh a bit and that's it. Terus segar bugar mata I nie. I memang cenggini. I can hear the phone ringing even in my sleep. That's why if I wish to have a good night sleep, I will put my phone into silent mode and leave it on the floor so that I can't hear the vibration sound if I put it on the table. Yes all. I can also hear the vibrating sound. Weirdo.

Okay, what else I wanna tell in here? Hmmm..

Yes. I started my diet plan again. For the how many times I don't know. Seems like I have to dieting forever but I can't manage to get back my old body figure. Sometimes I loose some kg's, then I start eating like hell again, then I put only double-up the loosen kg's. Haha.

As I started it this week, after I got back from hometown for the medical check-up thingy, I can proudly say that I have lose 1kg in less than a week. What did I ate? No special secret. I ate vegetables and some lauk for lunch. And for dinner meal, sometimes I took biscuit with tea or milo. But if I felt hungry during late night I took apple. So, that's the result.

Cakap bagus konon. Cess. I pray I can maintain this style of eating. Hopefully. Selalu I nie hangat-hangat taik kamben jer. Menci.

Okay, continue study. What? My study-for-final-exam progress? I managed to finished 4 chapters of Basic Entrepreneurship paper, yesterday. Today? No progress as I read through some articles for my Accounting Theories and Practices paper, but I can say that I only understand maybe 20% of it. Silly me. Susah laaa. Try lar baca tengok senang paham tak.

That's all for today. Bye all.

p.s. I rasa rindu Kak Farah sangat hari ni. :(
p.p.s. Another unrelated-to-the-entry-topic photo. Photo of my one of my Hello Kitty collection. I will update all of it gradually. This time is apa nama ntah. Usually people put it on the car dashboard. It will move when it receive the solar energy. Betol kot. I pon tak pasti. Weee.

Sindrom Demam Malam.

2009-10-20T21:05:00.004+08:00

This is the 3rd day I demam. Iskh.

During daylight my body temperature okay jer, behave jer. When maghrib comes then night, my body temperature start to rapidly increase.

Kenapa? Sindrom Demam Malam!!!

I nak cakap tu jer pon. Haha!! Takde keje kan? Saja jer nak update. Rajin tiba-tiba. Bluek!

p.s. Tak suka demam selsema batuk. Hidung sumbat. Tekak Sakit.
p.p.s. As usual, unrelated-to-the-main-topic photo. LOL. Rindu si comel nie. (photo taken when I took her to saloon, we past by the Pasaraya Kawan (Anis Safinas suka tempat nie..hehe) and this cute lil Shasha insisted to naik that thingy.)

Tulis entri sambil kembangkan hidung. LOL.

2009-10-20T14:20:00.008+08:00

Hye all..
I woke up early in the morning. MAK called asking me about my fever condition. I said I'm getting okay. Last night my body temperature was really high I think, like holding hot boiled kettle. Bluffing!!! Hahaha..

Eh..serious laaa..my body temperature is okay now. I think the fever gets worse only during night time. Day time relax jer babe. Siap boleh makan kuaci lagi. Hehe.

Okay, after MAK called I couldn't manage to continue my sleep again. I can't just lay down on my bed and layankan the fever right. So, I made up my mind to get up and belek2 buku. OMG! I just have 2 more weeks to go to final exam. Adoyai! 1 habuk pon I tak prepare lagi. I got up, then terus duduk kat study table. Yes!! Dapat mood terus.

Okay! I started with study for Basic Entrepreneurship paper which the final exam for this paper will be held on November 4th. On the day before which is November 3rd, I'll sit for Issues in Management Accounting paper. So, basically I will put extra attention on accounting paper, I know best that I will abandon this teras University paper, so, better I study from now kan. Why not I finish up all my basic teras University papers then only focus on my accounting papers. Adoi. Cam keling da ayat I. Sorry lar yer. LOL.

Pening lar bace! Lantak la. Suka hati I lar nak tulis camner kan.

Okay, moral of the story I nak bagitau yang I telah berjaya menghabiskan 2 chapters untuk paper Basic Entrepreneurship tue tadi. Bangganya saya.....Ehem..Ehem..

Hmm..Busuknya. Nak mandi. Bye all!!

p.s. Doakan saya cepat sembuh. Terima Kasih.
p.p.s. I think I wanna start showing off my Hello Kitty collection. Ada la sikit. For the 1st one is Hello Kitty bowl hugger. You guys can always get this when you buy Kellogs cereal. LOVE bought this for me. Hehe. Comel kan? Masa I makan I rasa cam Hello Kitty tue tengok I jer. Suke.
p.p.p.s. Kenape lari topik? Ala. Suka hati I lar. Iskh. Okay mandi.

100th post

2009-10-19T18:12:00.006+08:00

Fuuhh..Fuuhh..Fuuuhhhhh...
Banyaknyer habuk blog I nie. Iskh. Sorry blog, I tak sengaja dah abaikan you.

What am I going to say today? Hmmm.. Still thinking.

Looking at Diya's 100th post entry, I just got jealous. Sila jangan dengki wahai cik zizee. LOL.

Diya was doing one contest namely "The 100th Post Giveaway". Diya was prepared a sweet swirls frame as a gift for the winner. Opps! Forgot to tell, the contest was about creating a banner, doodle or anything which symbolized 100. Damn I didn't manage myself to enter that contest. I was busy ant hometown. Alasan. Grin.

As for my very own 100th post, frankly saying that I didn't prepare anything to celebrate it. Other number of post probably. I am really busy now. Not really busy actually but I pretend as busy jer. Haha. Final exam is just around the corner. As this is going to be my very final semester living in this varsity, I hope that I can give my very best in my study.

Owh? Lappy? Lappy is still in my hand. Last time I went back to hometown but I made up my mind not to leave it behind as I know best that I will definitely missed it very much. Instead of leaving lappy at home, I promise myself to be more discipline in term of using the lappy. For an example I will only use this lappy when I feel "tepu" while studying. Or maybe when I feel lost. Okay. Okay. I try laaa... Only switch on this lappy several hours a day.

Eh. Forgot to mention. I just finished re-arrange half of my room. In here, the hostel. Before this my table was facing the wall where I put all those notes, bills, photos and so on. But now, I change it to face the window. So that I can have a green view scenery when I'm studying. Of course lar, outside the windows is a big tree, I don't know what type of tree but one thing for sure the tree is green. Sedap mata memandang. Big Grin.

Okay all, I'm going to take bath. By the way, I demam nie. Selsema and batuk yg sangat teruk. Hidung asyik gatal jer. Benci la. Tak selesa. Tapi taknak makan ubat, boleh?

Bye all.

p.s. Berat badan naik lagi selepas raya. Sia2 jer diet mase puasa. Menci.

Sending lappy back to hometown?

2009-10-10T04:29:00.006+08:00

I'm still thinking getting rid of my lappy. I'm thinking of sending my lappy back to my hometown. Leave it there. Or maybe let LOVE keep it for sometime, just until I finish my final paper on November 20th.

I'm seriously couldn't 100% focus on my study if this lappy still with me. Yes, I know. Before this I already owned this lappy and still I can study. But now, lappy seems to be the main things which really good in diverting my attention. Perhaps on surfing, blogging, YM-ing, facebooking as well as watching movies and Korean dramas.

As this is going to be my very final semester in varsity, I'm thinking if it is better for me put 200% efforts on my studying. Final exam is just around the corner. 3 weeks to go for it. And I realized it is not so much time for me. I really need to kick my ass and study and not doing another job rather than studying.

I wish I can go back to my Matriculation years. Where I don't diverting my attention into another business. Everything in my mind was just study and score well in the exam. And yes, I did succeed during my Matriculation years. My CGPA is in the first class level.

Same goes to my SPM years. I scored well too. No lappy at all. I studied with just listening to my old school walkman. No such thing like MP3 or Ipod. LOL.

As a matter of fact, I think I should go back to whom I used to be. The older Azie. With the warmth spirit. Nothing else but study. C'mon Azie..!! I know I can do it if I really focusing.

p.s. Makin besar makin kurang daya ingatan. Iskh. Iskh.
p.p.s. Apart of that, I will surely gonna missed my blog and my new interest, facebook.

Older vs Newer

2009-10-07T01:44:00.006+08:00

The old good days picture. While we were in our secondary school. Taken from Diya's facebook.

People, come. Look at the older me. LOL. Kelakar kan?
This picture also from Diya, if I'm not mistaken. She gave me while we chat on YM.
Below, are photos with the latest me. I manage to find only these 2 photos in my lappy. Taken by Kak Ayu (my sis-in-law), just before Ramadhan. Raya's photos in Adik's lappy, forgot to copy last time. Sorry.
Okay? Can you all see the different? The older me and the latest me? Haha!! From the tiny-petit-skinny type of body, became the fat-debab-tembam body.

p.s. Nak kurus semula. Tapi cam mustahil jer. Huhu.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOVE..!! (updated)

2009-10-03T23:20:00.006+08:00

It is October 3rd, 2009, and it is LOVE 26th birthday..!!

12.00 a.m. - I wished him a very happy birthday. He asked me to sing him a birthday song while he ate the cupcake (the one which I ordered from Kak Rani, Bake2Decorate). I refused. Malu lar konon.

Then he sang the birthday song to himself, alone, with a pretty sad voice.

Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to Sabri,
Happy Birthday to me.

I laughed my heart out. He have to sing the birthday song by himself, on his birthday.

Then I said, let me sing a song for him, but in Mandarin Languange. I learned from my Chinese friend, back to my SPM year's.

Chu ni sheng rhe quai lhe.
Chu ni sheng rhe quai lhe,
Chu ni sheng rhe quai lhe Darlin',
Chu nie sheng re quai lhe.

Okay. Okay. I don't know how to spelling it into word, but I know how to pronounce it. Good enough for me.

Back to several weeks ago, I had a plan in my mind. Something like to throw a surprise birthday party for him. But, last minute, tak menjadi because of some unexpected circumstances thingy happened. Never mind la, as long as he happy.

p.s. Later I will upload the surprise cupcakes together with a gift for him.
p.p.s. Thanks a lot to Dya and Sha for giving me an idea of buying that gift for him. He loves it!!

Pictures credit to Bake2decorate.

Convo? Uhh..!!

2009-09-28T19:32:00.003+08:00

I'm back. Definitely with a better mood. I'd managed to tell everything to LOVE. What a relief I feel inside when I can spell everything out to someone, instead of just keep it inside my ownself.

Okay, that's not the main point I wanna to stress in here.

I met with my old friend since I stayed in Tradewinds Residential College, almost 3 years back I think. She came by to collect her "jubah konvo" here. By the way, to be clear in here, my batch (UUM's accounting 2005/2006 batch) will be having their convocation early of October, which falls next week.

I really don't know how to act when I meet them again. To see them wearing their jubah, with holding the scroll, it's such a great pain for me. I feel like flying away and dissapear to somewhere else, where no one will talk about all the convocation's thingy.

I'm still keep on thinking, whether I wanna stay here and give them a visit at the convocation's day, or maybe I'll make my way back to my hometown. Hmmm.. I'm really hate to think that I'm still stuck in here when actually this coming October should be my convocation's day. Arghh..!!

p.s. Kalau tak accident hari tu, mesti I sedang gembira sekarang prepare utk convo. Sigh.

Saya Sangat Marah! Grrrr...

2009-09-27T13:56:00.004+08:00

Hello people.

As usual, I will write in here whenever I have something in my mind which I couldn't tell anyone. Writing has been the best way for me to let out everything which I can't tell anyone.

I feel uneasy now. I just received a call from someone, the respectful one. I heard something which really pointing at me. This story was begun or told by someone (I'm starting to hate her now) to my respectful one (the one who called me just now).

Urghh!! I'm soooo angry now until I feel like killing someone. How dare she keep interupting into my private life. Seriously. She is witch!!

I hate to be like this. I hate to get angry by my own, when actually she feels nothing out there. Arggghh!! I pray to the Highness for never ever makes me meet her again. Ever in my life. I don't know how I can control myself if she is in front of me right now.

I hate to think and to know that everyone including my respectful one is actually 100% believe on whatever she said. Owh!! She knows best how to gain people attention by creating all the sad stories. She knows best how to makes people think she is the best girl ever in the world. F-ing word!!

To be frank, before this I already felt bad. And now, I feel bad again. I couldn't tell this to anyone. I can't tell anyone everything she did, because I know no one will ever believe in me. As I said before, she is good in acting.

p.s. Saya sangat marah!!!
p.p.s. Maaf. Saya menulis dalam keadaan marah.

Aidilfitri Menjelma Lagi

2009-09-25T19:13:00.000+08:00

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI
MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN

Ikhlas daripada:
AZIATUL AZUA HAJI MOHD NOR

Special Post for Dya!!!

2009-09-10T19:15:00.003+08:00

Today is September 10th, 2009.
And that means today is Dya's birthday!!!!!!!!
Yeaaaa...
You are soooo 23rd now dear.
No more crying okay.
Look forward.
I will always pray for your happiness.

Thanks for the friendship dear.

p.s. I always think that dya's birthday on September 9.
Haha. Remember film by Pierre Andre? 9 September.

p.s. Yes. Dya is Pierre's big fan. Haha!!

Bully.

2009-09-09T01:03:00.003+08:00

Chop!! I just realize that this is going to be my 91 posts..!! I started to involve in this blogging thingy since February 14, 2009. Yes. It is my 8th months here. Haha. Excited. LOL.

Seriously I don't have any idea what I'm gonna talk about today. Oh! Okay! Got it! Here we go.

I've been super busy these days. Working on my 2nd-time re-do case study for Accounting Theory and Practice paper. Earlier we (me and the other 4 members) were working on Transmile Accounting Fraud Scandal. Then happened some conflict between us and one of the group in the same class, which also been working on the same chosen company.

After some cat-fights, we lose. Then only came another fraud company case study. This time we were analyzing the most recent fraud case involved Satyam Computer Services. My part was the Elaboration of the Case. No big deal for me. But by having looked at the previous job with this group, I rather do some extra work just for the back up.

As usual, I always have to be the group's leader, I can say for all the papers I take this semester. Ahh! Never mine about that. I'm getting used to it. Okay, as the leader, it is a must for me to do the editing part.

As you guys who been studied before, editing part is the most tiring part ever. You have to deal with some unfavorable situations like:

"membabi buta" copy and paste job - Personally, I really can't stand with this kind of behavior. It is fine with me if they want to do the "copy and paste" thingy. It's normal right? Nahh..Don't bluff. I know everyone had done this before. In fact I did it too. But, just do it professionally. Don't just simply copy and paste and then submit. When copying and pasting, the story line shouldn't be off from the track. And select the best part to copy and then paste it. Plus don't forget to credit the author of the sources. Adoyai..!! takkan nie pon I nak kena ajar?
late submission - Okay, just let's say the dateline of the assignment is on September 10, 2009. As a good member of the group, we need to submit it to the leader a few days before the dateline. Editing job isn't easy at all. Normally, 2 or 3 days should be so nice for editing. The editor need to thoroughly check on each and every single word. Arranging the contents so it will become more easier for the reader (lecturer) to read and review it. In my case, I always have to face with the last minute submissions. Hisshh!!

Okay enough with those two. Get back to my story. As noted earlier, I lead all the group for all the papers taken for this semester. So, frankly saying that I feel stupid now. I feel like I've been bullied by my group members. Yes, I am the super duper senior here. Unfortunately I'm the one who have to do most of the work.

I guess people will start to question why I had to be that way? Okay. I'm not a perfectionist, but I love to do 99% perfect job. Whenever I wanna do something, I wish I can do it best. I am really not very-early-to-submit people. I do my job gradually, so that I can enjoy doing it. No rushing. But I will make sure my job done on that particular date. I'll make sure everything is done perfectly just up to reach my standard level of perfect. Only then I can feel easy.

Eh. It is 2 am. I wanna do some finishing touch on my Business Ethics group assignment. See? I'd done editing the assignment 2 days ago. But still I wanna do another double triple what-so-ever checking. Am I a perfectionist? Naaaahhh...

Bye all.

p.s. I haven't sleep since yesterday. Honestly.

Dunia Oh Dunia.

2009-09-05T04:52:00.004+08:00

My wrist watch showed 7.05 pm. I just placed an order for Bihun Tomyam at Charen Restaurant, somewhere in the small city of Changlun. I went to CMart, one and only shopping mall (should I call it as mall? whatever..) in Changlun, which actually situated opposite the Charen's. My main purpose was to go to Maybank ATM inside the building, to withdraw some money.

After withdrawal, I looked at my wrist watch again. It showed 7.11 pm. Okay! Still have some very last minutes time before Maghrib. I made up my mind, I went the 1st floor of the mall. I wanna buy some movies. I can't barely remember when was the very last time I went to cinema. Perhaps with LOVE, back to more than a month ago if I'm not mistaken.

In order to go to my favorite "pirated-DVD" store at the very end of the corner, I have to walk through some cyber circle stores, which we can find many H/P stores there. As I walked in front of the stores, i stopped by at Nana's cubicle. Nana is my friend, just a normal friend.

While having some updates chatting with Nana, I heard some unfavorable conversation from one Malay Pakcik (older that my ABAH from the style) and one Chinese girl (my age I guess).

Malay pakcik : Amoi, bak mai tengok handphone ni. (He was pointed at one of the h/p inside the glass display)

Chinese girl : Boleeeehhh.. Eh! Jam sudah pukul tujuh suku. You talak mau buka puasa meh? (She was looked at her wrist watch while she took the particular h/p from the display)

Malay pakcik : Takpa eh. Saya bukan puasa pon. Dah kenyang makan nasi mamak tadi. Hahaha. (He laughed. He seems very proud when he said those stupid statements)

Chinese girl : Ha?? You tak puasa? Orang melayu kena puasa kan. Ini bulan puasa kan. Mana boleh makan hari siang. (She talked with a very confuse face)

Malay pakcik : Aaahhh. Puasa hari pertama cukup lar moi. Hahahaha......

Hearing that, I was like...hmmm...BUAT MALU KAUM!!! That time I was "this" close to go and ask that stupid-very rudeMalay pakcik. I really wanna ask him if what is his religion? I wanna ask if he have any kids by his own? And I wanna ask like everything, just everything. GERAM!!! BONGOK!!!

I keep thinking about it myself, what will the Chinese girl be talking about this? How will she perceive Islam? Hmmm..

p.s. Even my 6 years old nephew knows what is PUASA means. Adoi. Sakit otak I.

p.s. Don't get me wrong. I've got "cuti istimewa" from God. That's why I don't care about the breakfasting time.

Cut the ties.

2009-09-02T15:39:00.004+08:00

"What is a friend? A single soul, dwelling in two bodies" - Aristotle

Today I would like to talk about FRIENDSHIP. I don't have any strong reason why I should talk about this since I have many good friends here and there. I can always make good friends wherever I might go. In fact i love to be friend with everyone. Friends are can be find in anywhere, at anytime. Friends always come and go. But true friendship seems really hard to be found. Once I found it, I always hope it will last forever. Unfortunately, I think I'd lost it now. In fact, throughout my lifetime, I think I'd lost a lot of special friends. And this is actually keep bothering me recently.

True friendship is an amazing thing for me. True friendship happened once I put her in special place in my heart. Then I will be more comfortable being together with her. I can feel the special bond between the two of us. My love towards her will grow stronger day by day. Sometime I even think that she is going to be someone I can share my life story with.

True friendship also means companionship. To keep accompany me throughout my good and bad time. She also did it. I can always laugh like crazy or cry my heart out in front of her. I can always share the secret of my life with her, without feeling ashamed.

But now, as time goes on, as we been so far apart, I can feel the love between us seems fading away into the thin air. She can't barely talk to me for an hour anymore, just like we always did before. She seems so cold.

I keep figuring it out myself, did I ever do anything wrong? Did I am the one who made this thing arose? Did I messed everything up?

I don't know. I don't have any idea. All I know is she is now no longer want to be friend with me anymore. The true friendship is gone between us. But maybe I am wrong. Hmm. Who might knows?

Bye all.

p.s. I am lucky enough that I still have my good old days friends with me now. Yes! You all from SMKGR. You guys will always be my truly friendships forever. I promise. Especially to Dya, Diana, Dzul Nyet, Sepiah etc.

p.p.s. I met with Yasmila last holiday, and I feel so happy. She is my best friend from my National Service session.

p.p.p.s. Cik Lynndon also. My best buddy from Pahang Matriculation College. So happy to get connected with her now.

p.p.p.p.s. My Busuk Jesnita also!!! The best roomate ever. Same goes to Cik Semah, missed her like crazy.

Today is Tuesday.

2009-09-01T15:30:00.003+08:00

Today seems to be a nice day. I woke up at 2pm. Having gossips on the phone with MAK for over 40minutes. Then YMing with Cik Dya and Cik Lynn. Rindu mereka.

Okay stop. No hard feelings.

Today i have to go to laundry. Dah melimpah ruah bakul laundry saya. As usual, pakaian dalaman saya basuh sendiri. Pakaian luaran saya kena outsource. Hahaha.

Then, go to Bazaar Ramadhan at Changlun to buy some foods for breakfasting. One thing for sure is no more NASI for breakfasting. It will ruin my this year Hari Raya Mission - to wear KEBAYA.

Tonight I wish I can finish all my 5 Chapters Discussion Questions for Strategic Management. Then I wanna have early bed.

Hope so.
Bye all!!

p.s. Rindu rendang ayam MAK!!!

Our Crocs.

2009-08-31T04:20:00.002+08:00

Went to Kinta City, Ipoh last time.
With MAK and GEM (my younger brother).
We ended up bought these.
MAK's treat!!!

My Fuchsia Mary Jane.
A bit regret about the size.
Perhaps next time I should buy W9 instead of W8.
Leave a lil roomy in the shoes.

Hello Kitty Jibbitz.
The left one is holding ice cream,
while the right one is holding flowers.
Soooo cute!!

3D Mermaid Jibbitz.
Hehe. She is cute right?
This is MAK's.
I would prefer the pink color. MAK too.
But size W10 was out of stock.
No choice, MAK can't wear W9. A bit tight.
But its okay which color we bought, as long as it is comfortable.

p.s. I want Malindi Leopard. Last time, no stock at the Kinta City Crocs outlet. Frust!

I hate.

2009-08-29T04:45:00.004+08:00

It's 4.45am now. The clock keep continue ticking. But I still couldn't even close my eyes. It tooks me couple hours to sleep. Ermm. I am confuse.

I don't know how to describe this feeling. I feel it again, after quite sometime I haven't felt it. The loneliness comes again. Lingering in my heart.

Today is the 8th Ramadhan. I only had one chance to berbuka puasa with my family, which was for the 1st day of fasting. Then, the 2nd day I had my breakfasting meals with LOVE. Then, started from the 3rd day of fasting until today, I had my breakfasting meal with only me. No one was there.

Myra, my new roomate always having it with her friends. I don't want to be too pathetic to ask them if I can join them. My other junior coursemate not at the same college block with me. Who else I have left? No body. No one anymore. MAK and ABAH at home. LOVE also at his hometown. Ghul is not here. Lodi is not here. Jojo was gone. Lean also. Semah also is not here. Jesnita also. Hany bany also. Markonah also. I have no one closer anymore.

For the 3rd day of fasting, which was the first day I have to face all this loneliness, I wasn't felt anything. I ate my meal happily. I finished up my Transmile Case Study while having my breakfasting meal. I didn't feel anything. Zero. I was too busy in order to complete my leftover works.

Then, came up the next day. Around 6.30 pm I was gone to the UUM's Bazaar Ramadhan. Alone again. I bought kuew teow goreng kerang, 3 pieces of karipap and orange juice. Then, when I arrived at my room, I felt empty. Another lonely breakfasting. I was cried my heart out while having my meals. I can't even hold it back.

I hate to have this feeling. I hate to be alone. I hate to feel lonely. I hate to make myself to believe that no one is here with me anymore. I hate all these.

Kak Ngah!!

2009-08-22T12:57:00.003+08:00

Non-stop eating..!!

Today I would like to write about my second elder sister. KAK NGAH..!!

She insisted me to write something about her in my blog. Actually she just noticed that I have my own blog when she started to involve into this mutual life. Haha. Before this she didn't really care about internet. She didn't really get herself to keep updated with the global connection through internet. But now, no longer exist such lady.

What should I tell about her? Hmmm.. Let's begin with who actually she is. She is my second elders sister after ALONG (my elder sister). She is marrying to a man named Suhaimi, who I normally called ABANG NGAH. Opps!! Now I addressed him as ABANG "SUL". Haha. Only my family knows what does "SUL" means. Jahat I. Okay. They both were gifted by God with one and only daughter. Their daughter is AYA, who is now pursuing her Diploma in Masterskills College.

KAK NGAH was a teacher before. But now she switched to another field of work.

She is a very beautiful lady very fair skin. She have a dark-choc-hazel eyes color. Menyampah!! I always says that she is very lucky to have all that as a woman. No wonder she still looks pretty even though her body figure changed. Ohhoo..I'm not saying she is fat. Eh!! FAT!! What is that?? Sorry Kak Ngah!!!

One thing very funny about her. Whenever she laugh to death, or she shy about something, her face skin will turn to red color. I was told by my Chinese girlfriend, within Chinese society, anyone who have a red in color skin is the one who likes and eat a lot pig. By knowing that, we always tease her with the fact. Poor her. Hahahaha!!!

What else about her? Hmmm.. Aha!! She likes to goyang-goyang her legs. We called that as menjahit. She can't even stop herself from doing that habit. I think a lot of people out there also have this kind of habit. But I am not doing that. Sometime maybe. Only when I am in crucial thinking situations.

Kak Ngah is a isteri mithali to his husband. She is a loyal wife. She is also a good mother to AYA. Just imagine, in my whole life I never had experience to see her scolding her daughter. She is very patient even though she had faced a lot of hard and difficult situations in her life. For her, whatever comes is a challenge from God. All she need to do is be patient.

I think that is enough for now. I've got something to do. A bundle of assignments are waiting for me. Stop right now!!

p/s: Laparnya.

Ramadhan bulan mulia.

2009-08-22T12:34:00.003+08:00

Selamat Menyambut Ramadhan al-Mubarak.
Selamat menjalani ibadah puasa diucapkan kepada
semua Muslimin dan Muslimah di seluruh dunia.

Tagging Game

2009-08-18T07:50:00.006+08:00

It's been a while since my last entry. As usual, I was too occupied with my assignments. Seem don't really have time to update. I just ignore my poor blog, facebook, friendster, emails and so on. Opps!! Not only that. Actually I am not really into the mood of blogging.

I woke up real early today. 6.30 am. Good job!!

Okay. Let's straight forward to the main course. I did some blog walking just now. Make myself keep updated with my friends' blog. I take this game from Hana' Fedora Journal. I think it is quite interesting game to do. This is sort of tagging games. She tagged anyone who read it. So, let's start!

1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

4. Tag 15 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?

Stranger (Hillary Duff)

Hahaha..Poor that "someone".

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRl?

I'll Be Your Love (Nicole Schezinger)

Opps!! Not to everyone please. So far I'd only said this to LOVE. The one who I really like the most.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?

I'm Grown (Tiffany Evans ft. Bow Wow)

Yes. Agree. To show everyone that I am really grown up.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?

Aint No Other Man (Christina Aguilera)

Huiyoo! See! I am a loyal lover.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?

Pieces Of Me (Ashlee Simpson)

Hehe. Cool. Well, at least I will stay forever in their mind.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?

My Baby You (Marc Anthony)

I love MAK and ABAH!!

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?

Intuition (Jewel)

Harus!!

WHAT IS 2+2?

The Remedy (Jason Mraz)

What does this means? Hmm..

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?

Hey Ya (Outkast)

I think I should keep in touch with them, more often. Arghh!! I am a bad friend.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

No One (Alicia Keys)

Woww!! WinAmp is really my best friend. It can listen to my heart. Hehe..

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

Sexuality (Beyonce)

Haha..Do I? Naaaahhh!!

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

Beautiful Girl (Sean Kingston)

Serious!! I am not lying. This song came up when I press the next button!!

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

Mama (Spice Girls)

Hmm..Do I think about his/her mom whenever I see them? I don't think so.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU

Last Night (P. Diddy ft. Keyshia Cole)

They might thinking about what time did I off to bed last night.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?

What's Your Flava? (Craig David)

Haha..I can't dance!!

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

Look At Me (Geri Halliwel)

Will anyone dare to do this by that time? Haha!!

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?

Is It Any Wonder? (Keane)

Hehe..I don't have idea what is my real hobby actually. Silly me.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?

The Real Slim Shady (Eminem)

Hehe..Slim? Iskh! Tension I.

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?

When I Think Of You (Lee Ryan)

I will turn crazier than ever. Euuuwww!!!

HOW WILL YOU DIE?

Bring Me To Life (Evanesence)

I wish my life will be forever. Can I?

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?

The Sharpest Lives (MCR)

Hmm..

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?

Pocketful Of Sunshine (Natasha Bedingfield)

No comment.

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?

Save Me (Remy Zero)

I love it. It show there is someone who always love me.

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?

I Don't Care (Ricky Martin)

Am I? I don't really care about it now. Later maybe. When the right time arrive.

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?

Boys And Girls (Good Charlotte)

Nope.. Let them be.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?

Take My Breath Away (Berlin)

Hehe..Cute answer. :P

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?

Fix You (Coldplay)

Awesome!

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?

What I've Done? (Linkin Park)

What is it actually?

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?

The Sweet Escape (Gwen Stefani ft. Akon)

Hahahaha!!! I love this game!

I would like to tag this to everyone who read this. Try it. Do it now. This is wonderful game!! Promise!

Sudoku Alphabets

2009-08-09T23:26:00.004+08:00

I am now surfing from one of small cyber cafe situated behind LOVE's office. It is somewhere in Sungai Petani, Kedah actually.

I have nothing to do now. So bored even though a lot of assignments are waiting to be done by next week. Hehe. I went to LOVE's office today. I just doing nothing beside having little chat with his staffs. After that I just stayed at LOVE's office room. Doing some SUDOKU.

Actually I just learned how to play Sudoku Abjad (Sudoku Alphabets). It was introduced by LOVE. I found this Sudoku Alphabets somewhere is LOVE's luggage. I never have any idea that there are other version of Sudoku, which is using alphabets. Before this I only knew about normal Sudoku, which is using numbers.

During our lunch time, he taught me how to play it. Just imagine, for the first time of playing it, I took almost half an hour to finish one Sudoku Alphabets game. LOVE already finished up his lunch but my first Sudoku game was not. Haha. How slow I am..Hehe..It is normal right, for the first time learner like me. 30 minutes is quiet fast I think. Perasan.

Then, I did my second Sudoku Abjad game. Guess how long did I take to finish it? Haha.. I done the second game for only 15 minutes. Ehem..Ehemmm.. I was sooo impressed by my performance. Hehe.

I was really enjoyed playing it. I did my third, fourth, fifth and many more games in LOVE's office room. Now, my bestest record is 9 minutes. Arghh..I want to do it again after finish this entry. I wanna beat LOVE's record, 6 minutes. Eleh..Only 3 minutes different from mine. Tak herannn... I will do my best. I wish I can manage 3 minutes record. Can I? I can do it!!!

P.S. To LOVE, don't show off ek. 6 minutes konon..Nyampah..

The only LOVE in my life.

2009-08-06T03:53:00.003+08:00

I feel no longer lonely to live in here, despite I have no more best friends studying in here. I mean in UUM. Dayah, Yanie, Jojo, Lean, Semah, Markonah, Jesnita, Hany Bany, Ibu and many more friends are now on their way to succeed in their own chosen carrier? Definitely leaving me behind.

For the past few weeks, which fell at the very beginning of this semester, I felt so lonely. I looked all around me, they were all gone.

Frankly says, I am really down whenever I'd heard or even read their blogs. To know they are all now already made one more steps in their life, which is moving into the world of carrier. But, above all, I feel so happy for them.

Enough. That is not really my main purpose to write this entry.

For the fact that LOVE is always around here, to join all the expos or event hosted by UUM, I feel no more lonely. I have him around me. What else will I asked for? Haha!!

I love to write about LOVE. Scrolling at my latest entries, I realize that there are limited entries about LOVE. No wonder why he always complaining to me. Some sort like,

LOVE: B, I visit your blog just now. Lame tak tengok. Busy sangat.
Me: Yer? Hehe.. I wrote about pimples!!
LOVE: Takde pon entry pasal I.
Me: Yer ker? Eh..Ader lar sayang...(Pujuk baiiikkk...)
LOVE: Mana ada. I telah dipinggirkan. Hukhuk!
Me: Alamak!!

To LOVE, here I write about you dear. No forcing. I rather do this with my full heart.

I don't know how lucky I am to have LOVE in my life. He has been so good to me. Maybe it's not too much if I say, he has been great to me. He will always be the one who will "mengalah" whenever the crucial times arrieved. I know it is not easy for a very-hot-tempered guy like him to be surrended first, and then begging me for forgiveness eventhough most of the times it was me, who actually started the fights. Hehe. Baik kan I.

Actually before I met with his family, and become so much closer like we are nowadays, I don't really know that LOVE had that kind of very-hot-tempered behaviour. Okay yes, my cousin, who is actually LOVE's ex-classmate in secondary school had told me several stories or situations to show me that LOVE have that behaviour. But, as I said, I didn't really realized it.

Untill the day of meeting with his family. Officially met. It was back to 3 to 4 years back. I had so much chat with his mom, sisters, brothers and even with his nephews and nieces. For the very first time met with them, the little sister of him, Piqah, asked me this question.

Piqah: Kak Azie, camner ek Kak Azie boleh couple dengan Andak (LOVE)? Yer lar, kitorang semua agak kagum lar dengan Kak Azie.
Me: Eh, kenapa lak Piqah tanya camtu?
Piqah: Yer lar, Andak tu kan lain sikit. Andak tu pelik tau. Kalau dia dok rumah ni, senyap jer dia. Kitorang adik-adik semua takut dengan dia. Garang tau.
Me: Yer ker? Iskh..takde lar piqah. Andak tu baik lar. Tak pernah pon garang dengan akak.
Piqah: Andak tak garang? Merepek lar Kak Azie nie. Nak tau tak, Abang Chik (LOVE lil bro) tu takut giler dengan Andak. Ateh (LOVE lil sis also) pon tak berani sangat cakap dengan Andak. Piqah nie pon boleh kira berapa kali borak dengan Andak.
Me: Yer ker? Akak tak pernah sedar pon Andak tue garang..

After having little conversation with Piqah, I asked about that to his mom. Guess what? His mom said all of that is true. Haha!! Funny. How I didn't realized all of that before? Bad girlfriend huh?

Okay, let's move on.

As some of my friends know, I am a very "cengeng" girl. I have a really sensitive heart. I can simply turn into tears and cry and cry, just like a baby. I hate to watch sad movies. I can't hold back my feeling. I will cry eventhough there are so many people around me. My ADIK always laugh seeing me crying whenever we watch drama on TV. I will even cry when I see other people crying in front of me. Serious! Sensitive terlampau!!

Having said that, throughout my relationship with LOVE, it is for sure I'd cried a lot. I will cry eventhough for a simple tiny little thingy. LOVE always said that he is a bad boyfriend. He felt bad whenever he saw me crying. He might even think that he hasn't give enough to make me always smiling. But now, as time flies, and we are in 11th years of being together, seeing me crying is been a very normal thing to him. He will cuddle me, calming me down, giving me a warm hugs, kiss my cheeks, swipe my tears off, make me laugh and that's it! Then I okay lar! He is never fails doing all that to me. He loves me that much, rite?

Sometime I even think, the weakest part of LOVE is seeing me crying. I can assure that because whenever we had a fight, when actually I was the one who started it, and he gets really angry with me, then he raise his voice to me (just a little slightly higher I will say), and then confirm lar I cry at the moment his voice rising. Whenever the first tears drop, he will feel guilty. All the angers before will immediately gone. Dissappered into the thin air. Haha!! Then he will pujuk me again. Lucky me!

LOVE also has a very warm and comfortable body, despite he is very kedings. I love it whenever I feel tired or sleepy. Because I just love it when he put his arms around me, let his chest to be my pillow, playing with my hairs until I sleep. Soooo comfortable. I love it!! All this sort of situations will happened when he asked me to accompany him to watch movies, the boring one, which really not the type of movies I like the most. I will simply fall asleep for the first 15 minutes the movie just started. Membazir tiket jer.

What else ek? Actually I have so much other things I love to write in here. But too sleepy. It is 4.54 am now. And I don't even sleep. So, I think I will stop here. I will write more, maybe next time.

Till next entry!!

Nite all!!!

PS. I love you.

PPS. The above picture was taken during our lunch time. He is playing his PSP, and I just snapping here and there while waiting for the foods. That time I kidnapped him from his busyness. Hehe. I was really hungry. So what?

Pimples Oh pimples.

2009-07-30T01:55:00.011+08:00

Do I hate pimples?

I don't know the exact answer for this question. As far as I concern, many girls hating pimples so much. It is such a red swollen little stranger thing that suddenly appears to ruin they beautiful face. They said it gives them pains. Plus it also bring a new color, which is normally red or maybe for the worst such skin disease, on the face.

For me, I don't really care about pimples. I don't have this problem. The same situation goes to my other lady-siblings. It is undeniable that sometime me too will have to face this problem. I mean to have pimples on my face. This situation will be happened during menstrual period. I will have one or maybe two cute pimples on my cheeks or forehead. I don't feel that is my major problem. Sometime I might feel happy because those pimples appear on my face. I like to think that I have a cute tiny flower on my face. Silly me.

But this time is different. I had one big-very red- swelling pimples. It is really hurt especially when I wanna do facial wash. Aiyooo!!! Serious hurt!

People around me also will notice it. They will definitely questioned me.

Friend_1: What is that?
Friend_2: Besarnya jerawat kau.
Friend_3: Scary la tengok muka kau ada jerawat.

Me: Suka hati aku lar!!!!

LOVE also noticed the different look on my face.

LOVE: B, kenapa besar sangat jerawat BB nie?
LOVE: B, mari sini I picit. Geram tengok besar sangat.

Me: Arghh!! Takmau!!! Sakit lar!!!

Even MAK also noticed my pimples when she did 3G me last time.

MAK: Eh! Apa tu? Kat pipi tu?
Me: Jerawat lar mak. Dah 3 4 hari tak pecah lagi. Sakit lak tu.
MAK: Mak tengok bukan macam jerawat sebab besar sangat.
Me: Bistu macam apa?
MAK: Macam bisul jer. Esok pegi klinik!
Me: Yes Madam!

People always said, don't play with your pimples. Never squeez your pimples. Let it pecah sendiri. If not you will get the unwanted scar on your face.

But, I just cannot bare with the pain having that giant pimples on my face. The only thing I need now is a needle. Then everything will be okay. Haha!

Below I put two pictures taken after I had done the needle operation. Hehe.

Pissed -off.

2009-07-17T17:38:00.004+08:00

Another story about my new semester. Really forgot to write it in here.

To be cleared that I am now in my 7th semester for Accounting course. I was extended two semesters due to my sickness. To be specify, I had an accident in year 2006. Which made me to stayed at home because my right hand can't moved.

I was attended physiotherapy sessions for almost three to four months in order to make my right hand to be functioned again.

Okay. That is really a very long..long..time ago story.

Here a few situations when I entered new class and met with new friends.

Situation 1

Me: Hye, can I sit here?
Friend_1: Yes.
Me: Saya Azie. Awak?
Friend_1: Saya .... (I don't have any permission to mention her name here).

While we had a beginning chat, student in front of us passing the attendance list to us. In UUM, we have to sign the attendance list besides punch our student card at the machine near the class front door.

I signed the attendance list. As usual, my name will be on top. The first name in the list because the list were sorted by matrix number of the students.

My batch used to have only five numbers for our matrix number. But all juniors or batches after us having six numbers for their matrix number.

Friend_1: Awak semester berape sekarang?
Me: 7.
Friend_1: 7? Tapi kenape matrix number awak start angka 7? Kan sekarang semua start 10 dah kan?
Me: Ooo..Saya memang sem 7. Saya extend 2 sem dulu. Tapi extend tak diambil kira.
Friend_1: Maksudnya batch awak semua dah abis? Dah grad?
Me: Hmmm..Yer. Saya tinggal sorang jer. Semua dah habis.

Then, I kept silent. Tension.

Situation 2

I met my old friend somewhere in Faculty of Accountancy. I was walking to the class.

Friend_2: Eh! Azie!
Me: Eh! Haiiii...Lame tak jumpa...
Friend_2: Azie tak habis lagi ker? Ingatkan Azie practicum sekarang. Batch Azie kan da habis kan?
Me: Tak lar. Azie kan extend 2 sem. Nie final sem lar nie.
Friend_2: Ooo..Sabar yer Azie.
Me: Yer..Sabar...

Situation 3:

I don't like people to addressed me as "KAKAK".

Friend_3: Hai. Saye....
Me: Hai. Saya Azie.
Friend_3: Kak Azie sem berapa sekarang?
Me: 7. And jangan panggil saya Kakak. Just Azie.
Friend_3: Ala..Tak biasa lar kak. Kak Azie kan senior.
Me: Whatever...

Situation 4:

Friend_4: Hai. Awak sem berapa?
Me: 7.
Friend_4: Eh. Awak baru first time ker amik paper nie?
Me: Of course.
Friend_4: Ingatkan awak repeat paper nie.
Me: Excuse me. Saya tak pernah ada sejarah repeat paper yer.
Friend_4: Tak lar. Nie kan paper sem bawah.
Me: Oo..Saya memang plan nak amek paper nie final sem.

Argh!! Tensionnya jadi SUPER DUPER SENIOR!!!

I am left alone in here.

2009-07-17T16:30:00.003+08:00

It's been a while since my last entry. I just realized it a few moment ago. I was too occupied with my new semester. A lot of things to be done.

Now, I am in the middle of the crowd. I sit alone by myself at the center of Pusat Kegiatan Pelajar, UUM. I have nothing to do. I feel really bored. Waiting at LOVE's booth making me much more bored. Opps, forget to mention that LOVE is here. Yes, here. In UUM. He joins the Expo Keusahawanan organised by UUM management.

LOVE is currently in books selling's business. Religious books to be specify. Sooo...I am really not comfortable sitting at his booth. I don't do wearing scarf. My hair is blonde colored. I wear tight shirt and skinny jeans. Perhaps, I don't really feel comfortable to sit there and the customers will keep staring at me like I am an alien. Lost alien.

So, I grabbed LOVE's lappy then I came here. Haha. Peace!

Okay, what can I tell in here? I am figuring out while typing. Yes, I am still figuring out. No idea comes to my mind rite now. Effing word!!

Yes. Okay! I have an idea. Let's talk about my new semester and my new or very new friends. For all my readers, I am now in UUM. Still studying. It's my very final semester in UUM. (I hope no more semesters in this jungle) As being known by most of you, I was extended two semesters due to my sickness.

Now, my batch and all my friends were gone. They all already finishing their studies in here. In fact they had finished their internship by last month of June. How sad I was when they said they were all free now. I feel really sad knowing that I am the only one left.

I keep on saying to myself, don't give up. Only four months left . I can wait for last four and half year, and I am succeed. So, these four months should be nothing to me. Yes. I am strong!!

Okay. That's all for now. I want to continue my job. I am actually searching for journals about Strategic Management's assignment.

Bye all. Till next entry ya!!

Please, get a life!!

2009-07-10T04:17:00.004+08:00

I am very mad rite now. Huh! What actually on you guys mind? Seeing a "free hair" girl like me? Okay. I know, "tudung" or scarf is actually a must to a Muslim girls. We all, Islamic girls are supposed or maybe the rite word is COMPULSORY to wear scarf and cover our "aurat". But, never judge a girl like me, is very social and bad type of girl. I am not like that.

I was bored last few hours. LOVE is sleeping at the moment. I just couldn't make my eyes close and sleep. There's plenty of job to be done before this coming Sunday.

I was joined one chat room just now. Just to find someone to talk to. Since all my friends list in YM were offline. I just need somebody to talk. To fresh me up. Because I have to settle all these things.

Okay. Let's straight to the point. While I joined the chat room, I received some instant messages from several people. More specific, guys.

Chatter_1: Buzz
Me: Yes.
Chatter_1: Hye. Busy?
Me: Yes.
Chatter_1: Open x?
Me: Open? What?
Chatter_1: Horny lar.
Me: Excuse me....
Chatter_1: Ala..Xkan tak biase kot..Awk nie hot lar..
Me: Ok.
Chatter_1: Ala..Awk mesti da biase kan..Ala..freehair girl kan sporting..
Me: Hmmm..Bye.

Chatter_2: Abg horny lar yang....mmm...
Me: Excuse me..?
Chatter_2: Sayang nie cantik lar..Geram abg tgk..
Me: Bye.

Chatter_3: Hye wak..
Me: Helo..
Chatter_3: Buat per wak?
Me: Keje..
Chatter_3: Keje aper mlm2 nie? Nak join wak..
Me: Keje..My study's..Assignment..
Chatter_3: Kesian wak..Wak pakai baju aper mlm nie wak? Naked yer?
Me: Bye.

Chatter_4: Hye syg..
Me: Salah org ek?
Chatter_4: Mesti best kan dpt main dgn awak..
Me: F**K YOU!!

Chatter_5: Haiiiiii...
Chatter_5: Iiiiiiiii..Ada org x nie?
Chatter_5: Mari lar lyn abg..Abg sorg nie..Abg stim lar syg..
Me: Lantak kau lar!

Then, I ended up signed out from that bloody chat room. WTF!! What you guys expect? Seeing a girl like me? No..No..Please..I am very easy girl okay? I am my own pride. My own dignity. Please respect. That's all I need.

Reminder to myself:
NEVER EVER JOIN ANY CHAT ROOM!

PS. It wasn't a good idea to join a chat room in hour like now. Very early in the morning. All the chatters are sick!! Crazy!!

Semangat berkobar-kobar.

2009-07-07T12:25:00.006+08:00

Gain weight? Azie is gaining weight? Arghh!!

Yes, I am. I am gaining so much weight during last semester break. I didn't exercise at all. All I did was just lying on the bed, sleep. Then got up, eat some food. Nope, actually a lot of foods. Then, watching television. Listening to radio. Sorts of things. Huh!!

I am sick hearing people says, "Azie..Kenapa besar sangat nie.", "Azie..Tak percayanya Azie gemok cenggini. Dulu kecik jer."

I made up my mind. Azie, You need to get back your old-former body figure!

And for the solution, or the first thing on the list for me in order to realize my dream to get back all those my "zaman kegemilangan" is..

START TO WORK OUT AGAIN! GO TO GYM EVERYDAY!

Thanks, LOVE. For helping me choosing this shoes. I just love it!!

PS. I started my mission with treadmill for over 30 minutes non-stop.

PPS. Someone "cabar" me?? Another Guess handbag. Haha. Wait and see...

PPPS. I have to pretend like "MAKAN ITU TIDAK INDAH"

July 6th.

2009-07-06T13:29:00.003+08:00

It is the day.
May God bless you throughout the year.

The quick post.

2009-06-29T11:32:00.003+08:00

I have not been in a good condition these few days. And my brain seems stopped functioning. I just cannot think any topic to be talk in here.

To be inform that we, my former batch back to SMKGR's years will be having our "Slumber BBQ Party" at Sasha's place. This coming Friday.

A few internal conflicts arose but we managed to settle everything. No worries. No tears. No fights. No tensions. No depressions.

I just cannot wait for it. But, a lot of preparations must be done before the party. Huhu.

PS. I'm afraid if some friends will get heart attack by seeing my "new" fatty body. Haha.

PPS. What else can I sponsor? Spaghetti confirm. Else? Hmm..

Loneliness? Depression? Stressful? Dissapointed? I am OKAY..!!!

2009-06-24T18:59:00.009+08:00

Everyone in this huge world will experience the feeling of loneliness. In fact everyone will struggling to avoid that feeling.

Loneliness is always be a very hurtful feeling. Sometime I will never can manage to avoid the feeling of being lonely. Even though laughter is everywhere. Even though I was surrounded with the most wonderful people in the world. Somehow, the feeling of loneliness will keep coming to me.

It really hurts to be lonely. It always be the greatest need to be in loving relationship. I will feel very lonely when I don't feel the connection between me and the person I love and care about.

At the end of the day I will feel so stressed. I will feel so depressed. The feeling of depression will come to be friend with the feeling with loneliness.As usual, people who are lonely are usually depressed.

Whenever I feel lonely, I will definitely will feel like crying. Sometimes I wish someone could hold me. Give me the most warmth hug in the world. Sometime I feel like screaming so loud. With hope that the feeling of loneliness will go away from me. And with the hope that the desire of being held and admired by someone will vanish. Sometime I will like to spend the entire day in the empty room. Just me.

I will never give up to pray to the Divine that He will grant me a strength to face all this hurtful feelings. And maybe He will generously give me some courage to tell myself that I must get used with that feeling of loneliness. Freak! I don't want to get used to it. But the pain of being alone, is very difficult for me to bare.

P/S: It is really sad and pathetic when you are actually hoping someone to give you a ring but he never do that. The more you are hoping, the more you get disappointed. So, give up hoping. Just let it be. Live your life.

P/P/S: My dear bloggers, please be noted that I am not sad. I am just disappointing.

P/P/P/S: I still know how to smile. Hehe.

Sesi mengulangkaji matapelajaran Bahasa Malaysia. Dari Jia.

2009-06-23T00:15:00.006+08:00

Tugasan tag kali ini datangnya daripada Puan Aziha. Seorang teman baru saya melalui teknologi canggih yang dikenali sebagai internet ini.

Saya telah diamanahkan untuk menjawab tugasan tag ini dengan menggunakan bahasa ibunda kite, iaitu Bahasa Malaysia yang tercinta. Disebabkan peraturan untuk menjawab tag ini ialah menjawab dengan Bahasa Malaysia, maka secara tidak langsung saya juga turut menjalani sesi ulangkaji matapelajaran Bahasa Malaysia.

Selamat menjawab soalan dalam Bahasa Malaysia!

TAG 1

Bekas kekasih saya adalah : Merupakan seorang anak sulung.
Saya sedang mendengar : Bunyi ayam berkokok.
Mungkin saya patut: Betulkan kembali aturan masa tidur saya.
Saya suka : Menjerit. MAK selalu berkata "tak manis anak dara menjerit-jerit"
Sahabat-sahabat baik saya : Semua sayangkan saya. Kerana saya sayangkan mereka.
Saya tak paham : Kenapa cinta memberi saya merasai kesakitan. Padahal cinta itu adalah indah.
Saya kehilangan : Kata-kata jika berdepan dengan seseorang yang pendiam. Haha!
Ramai yang berkata : Saya sudah gemuk!! Cesss!!
Makna nama saya : Seorang yang cantik agaknya. Haha! Perasan!
Cinta itu adalah : Tidak menentu. Kadang kala membuat saya bahagia seperti di awang-awangan. Kadang kala menyakitkan.
Di suatu tempat, seseorang sedang : Tidur.
Saya akan cuba : Untuk tidak menyentuh nasi esok. Saya mesti memulakan kembali program diet sebelum semester baru akan bermula.
Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud : Sehingga nafas yang terakhir.
Telefon bimbit saya : Senyap sahaja hari ini.
Bila saya terjaga dari tidur : Perkara pertama yang akan saya lakukan ialah mencari telefon bimbit.
Saya paling meluat apabila : Orang memandang sinis terhadap saya.
Pesta/Parti adalah : Menggembirakan.
Haiwan yang paling comel yang saya pernah temui ialah : Saya tidak mempunyai idea kerana saya tidak suka haiwan. Maaf.
Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan bagi saya ialah : Zaman anak kecil saya. Kerana tidak ada masalah yang merunsingkan kepala.
Hari ini : Sangat panas.
Malam ini saya akan : Tidur.
Esok pula saya akan : Tidur. Sehingga tengahari. Haha.
Saya betul-betul inginkan : Kedamaian jiwa kerana jiwa saya kacau sejak kebelakangan ini.
Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini : Saya tidak lihat muka saya pada waktu pagi kerana saya bangun paling awal pukul12 tengahari.
Pusat membeli-belah atau arked permainan : Pusat membeli-belah. Suka!!
Makanan Barat atau Jepun : Makanan Barat.
Bilik yang terang atau gelap: Gelap.
Makanan segera adalah : Makanan yang dimasak secara segera. Haha.
Ayat terakhir yang anda katakan pada seseorang? I love you.

TAG2

Apakah perasaan anda sekarang? Runsing.
Saya nak makan? Laksa. Tadi seseorang memberitahu bahawa dia membeli sebungkus laksa di pasar malam. Sedap!
Saya tak suka? Bangun pagi. Haha.
Impian saya? Menjadi anak yang baik dan mampu membuat MAK dan ABAH gembira sepanjang hayat mereka.
Haiwan yang saya tak suka? Kesemua jenis haiwan.
Saya harapkan? Hujan akan turun pada malam ini.
Jika boleh putarkan masa? Saya nak betulkan apa-apa kesalahan yang telah saya lakukan.
Saya pada 10 tahun akan datang? Sudah mempunyai sebuah keluarga yang terdiri daripada seorang suami dan 3 orang anak.
Handphone saya adalah sebuah? Barang yang sangat penting dan wajib ada di sisi saya.
Saya pernah bercinta sebanyak? Sekali. Cinta monyet? Sekali juga.
Kawan-kawan saya? Terdiri daripada pelbagai bangsa.
Pernah dikhianati? Selalu.
Apa yang hendak anda lakukan terhadap orang yang mengkhianati anda? Saya hanya berserah kepada Allah S.W.T.
Siapa yang anda nak Tag? Dzul Nyet, Sopiah, Hany Bany, Lean, Hazali, Dya (Walaupun Jia sudah menge"tag" beliau) dan Hana Fedora.

Someone is upset with me.

2009-06-21T01:33:00.003+08:00

I am a fool.
I am a dumb.
I am too far from being perfect.
Above all, I am totally a mess!!

I am truly, deeply sorry.

Mari mewarna rambut.

2009-06-19T22:57:00.007+08:00

I was planned to color my hair. Due to my hair that grew longer and longer day by day. The color seemed faded away. My previous hair color was Natural Blonde by Revlon.

So, last Monday, I bought this color. Actually I wanted to buy the same color like the previous one. But I changed my mind. So, I bought this color.

Bright Auburn by Revlon

As usual, I don't really like to do hair coloring at Saloon. I think I can do it at home by myself. Just buy the color then do it at home. At the same time I can save my hair coloring budget. Haha.

So, that Monday's night, very late at night actually, I did the coloring alone. I left it on my hair around only 40minutes because I felt like sleepy. Really sleepy. I washed my hair. Then as a result, the color seems didn't work at all. Hmmm..Padan muka I!! Tak sabar lagi!!

Today, I woke up late. As usual. After took bath, I borrowed ABAH's car. I went to Guardian to buy the color for the second time.

Hmmm..No stock for Bright Auburn color. Frust!!

I made up my mind. Okay! Let's go for this color!

Strawberry Blonde by Revlon

This was my hair color before I re-colored it back.

GEMOK (my younger bro) gave an extra hand for me to re-color my hair. He did the spreading the colors on all over my hair. Thanks GEM!! Love you!

And this is the result.

Yes people. The same question keeps hitting me now. The color just like my previous hair color!!! Arghh!! Tension!! Nak color macam kat kotak tue!!

P/S: Maybe self-coloring at home just not a good idea.

P/P/S: ABAH!! Nak duit! Nak g Saloon!!

P/P/P/S: Ker ader saper2 nak sponsor I? Haha!! Kidding!!

Update!! Credit to Dya.

2009-06-19T00:04:00.004+08:00

Updated!!

Before corrected by Dya.

Thanks a lot dear.

It was only 3 hours left. But I already missed her now.

2009-06-18T21:17:00.021+08:00

Sms from ADIK:
"Sis, pinjam kete kau jumaat sampai ahad. Aku nak g Penang. Kawan aku kawen. Plzzzz.."

She texted me around 8.30am yesterday. As usual, that was my sleeping time. Never disturbing me until the clock strikes 12noon. Hehe. So, I didn't respond her at all.

Around 7.00pm yesterday. ABAH just got back from golfing. He received a call from ADIK. Abah said,
"Nak pergi Penang dengan saper? Tido maner? Naik aper pergi? Eh...Abah taktau dik. Adik tanye lar die sendiri."

A few minutes later, house's phone rang.
MAK: Hello. Kenapa dik? Ntah lar..Adik dah tanye kat die ker? Die takde pulak cakap aper2 kat mak. Adik call jer lar die. Die ader dalam bilik main games."

Just a seconds after MAK hung up. My handphone rang. T-shirt ringtone. Hehe. ADIK's name was appeared on the screen.

ME: Hello.

ADIK: Jie. Nak pinjam BEN kejap. 2 hari jer. Boleh lar. Plzzz...

ME: Ahhh..Kalo kau pakai BEN, aku nak pakai aper?

ADIK: Alaaa...boleh lar. Aku taktau AA (my big bro) pinjam kete aku. Boleh lar. Aku takde transport nie nak pegi nie. Plzz..Boleh lar. Kejap jer pon.

ME: Boleh, tapi ader 1 syarat. Hehehe..(I gigled)

ADIK: Syarat aper pulak kau nie. Hhhiisshh...Aper?

ME: Aku nak ikut!! Bagi aku yg drive sebab aku tak percaya kau nak drive jauh2 tue.

ADIK: Maner boleh!! Kau bukan ngam pon ng kawan2 aku. Bukan aku yg drive. Wan Korea yang drive nanti. Boleh lar..

ME: Aku bgtau Kaduk!! Kau curang!! Hehe..Aku nak ikut jugak!!

ADIK: Alaaaa...Ramai lar pegi. Iskh die nie!! Kedekut betol!! Cepat lar!! Kredit aku nak abis nie..

ME: Lantak lar!! Tak boleh!!

ADIK: Alaaaa...plzzzz...Aku nak pinjam kejap jer. Boleh lar. Kau da biase sgt pegi Penang. Kau takyah lar ikut. Boleh lar. Esok aku nak balik umah amek BEN. Boleh lar..

ME: Yer lar!!

Around 6.00pm today, ADIK arrived home together with MON (Her girlfriend). To take my BEN away for 3days.

ME: Japgi jangan lupa singgah kedai sparepart kat Bidor tue. Tukar minyak hitam. Tukar bulp lampu depan. Lampu rendah and lampu tinggi. Paham??

ADIK: Banyaknya!!! Yer lar..Iskh..Abis duit aku.

ME: Bukan duit kau pon!!

Hehe..We both always keep quarrel for small tiny thingy. Just for fun. While I read my P/S I love You at the living room, ADIK shouted from my room.

ADIK: Jie!!! Maner baju purple kau tue? Aku takde baju nak g rumah org kawen nnt.

ME: Semua barang aku kau nak pinjam??

ADIK: Ala. Boleh lar Kak Azie... Baju kau semua cantek2. Aku takde baju kurung cantek.

ME: Ader dalam almari baju kurung aku lar. Baju yang maner 1 kau nak "Hantu gigi"? (I always addressed her as Hantu Gigi due to her biggy teeth. Hehe)

ADIK: Yang jarang tue. Yang dengan kain songket tue.

ME: Semua ader dalam almari.

ADIK: Heee..Dah jumpa. Nak pinjam 2 pasang. Yang songket purple dengan songket pink tau. Aku taktau nak pakai maner satu lagi.

I was like..hmmm..nasib baik ader sorang jer adik perempuan...

Then after a few advices from MAK and ABAH, ADIK with MON left with my BEN.

Now, I feel really missed my BEN. She must be missing me too. Can't wait this coming Sunday to see her again. Please arrive home safely BEN.

P/S: Like I cannot live without her. Haha.

P/P/S: Patah kaki I!!!

Attention to Dya and Dzul Nyet!!

2009-06-17T23:38:00.016+08:00

I just came across Dya's blog. She update her blog with current post related to a love matter. It was about a girl named Katie who suffered from terminal cancer. Also her dear fiance, Nick, who always be by her side and never stop giving her full supports until Katie's last breath, which was happened on the 5th days she officially became Nick's. It was such true endless love story. The story was really touch my heart.

Having heard that Dya actually not in a good mood these few days. My dear, I know you are now in a situation where you really need to gather all your strength to face the true facts. Never mine dear, I just want to noted you that I will always here if in any case you might a good listener. Or maybe you need a shoulder to cry on. I will always be here, dear.

Now, I would like to talk about the main point for me to write this. Actually I want to dedicate this entry to two of my good old days friends. Dya and Dzul Nyet.

Actually, this love story had been in my storage for an ages. I don't really remember where did I found this. Might be from an email. It was about a love story between two best friends, Daniel and Jasmine.

Here is their love story.

Daniel and Jasmine are sitting alone in the park one night.

Daniel: I guess we are the left overs in this world.

Jasmine: I think so. All my friends have boyfriends and we are only the two persons left in this world without any special person in our life.

Daniel: Yes, I just don't know what to do.

Jasmine: I know!! We'll play a game.

Daniel: What game?

Jasmine: I'll be your girlfriend for 30 days and you'll be my boyfriend.

Daniel: That's a great plan. In fact I don't have nothing to do much these following weeks.

DAY 1:
They watched their first movie and they both touched in a romantic film.

DAY 4:
They went to the beach and have a picnic. Daniel and Jasmine have their quality time together.

DAY 12:
Daniel invited Jasmine to a circus and they ride on a Horror House. Jasmine was scared and she touched Daniel's hand but actually she was touched someone else's hand. They both laughed.

DAY 15:
They saw a fortune teller down the road and they asked for their future advice and the fortune teller said, "My darling, please don't waste the time of your life. Spend the rest of your time together happily." Then tears flow out the teller's eyes.

DAY 20:
Jasmine invited Daniel to go to the hill and they saw a meteor. Jasmine mumbled something.

DAY 28: They sat on the bus and because of a bumpy road, Jasmine gave her first kiss to Daniel by accident.

DAY 29:

11.37pm -
Jasmine and Daniel sat in the park where they first decided to play this game.

Daniel: I'm tired Jasmine. Do you want any drinks? I'll go and buy you one. I'll just go down the road.

Jasmine: Apple juice. That's all.

Daniel: Wait for me.

20 minutes later -
A stranger approached Jasmine.

Stranger: Are you a friend of Daniel?

Jasmine: Why? Yes. What happened?

Stranger: A reckless drunken driver ran over Daniel and he is critical in the hospital now.

11.57pm -
The doctor went out of the emergency room and he handed out an apple juice along with a letter to Jasmine.

Doctor: We found this letter in Daniel's pocket.

Jasmine read the letter and it says:
"Jasmine, this past few days, I realized that you are a really cute girl and I am really falling love for you. Your cherish smile, your everything when we played this game. Before this game would end, I would like you to be my real girlfriend for the rest of my life. I love you, Jasmine."

Jasmine crumpled the letter and shouted:
"Daniel!! I don't want you to die. I love you. Remember that night when we saw a meteor? I was mumbled something. I wish that we would be together forever and never end this game. Please don't leave me, Daniel. I love you! You cannot do this to me!!"

Then the clock strikes 12.

Daniel's heart stop pumping.

THEN IT WAS THE 30TH DAY.

Here some of my conclusions throughout reading this love story.

TO DYA.
Dear, just hang in there. Don't ever give a s**t to what was happened to you. Just accept the real facts. Somehow it may be brings a good fortune for you. Maybe someone around you is always loves you, silently. Someone that you don't even expect that he might be the one that was created by the Divine to be with you. To be your better half. Maybe it is good for you to just sit back and relax and never hoping for someone to come. Let the love comes to you. Never chasing it.

TO DZUL NYET.
Nyet, please don't hide your feelings. Give it a shot. Then she will know you are a grown man. Just be gentleman. Don't hold your feelings back to your own self. Show her how much you are dying to have her back. Show her the love, before it is too late. After all, Dya and me know best that you are still in loved with her. Be brave Nyet. Never wait until tomorrow. Who might knows that actually she has the same feelings towards you.

TO ALL OF YOU out there.
Always love your loved one. Show them how you feel for them, before it is to late. You will never know when they will gone from your embrace. Say that you loves them. Today is the day. Never wait until tomorrow. Love them while they are still here. And bear in mind, if nobody in the world to love you, then I will always be the one who will generously give my love.

Not forget TO LOVE.
I love you Sayang. It grew bigger and bigger each day. You better know that.

As FOR ME.
Love is such the greatest thing given by the Divine. Thankful that I ever have a chance to feel it. Alhamdullilah.

P/S: I love you.

Makan dalam NYIRU..

2009-06-17T00:21:00.009+08:00

I am not feeling well for these few days. Today, I feel better or maybe good is the right word. And the most important is my appetite is back!!

I asked MAK to go out for dinner. In my mind was a "laksa" Kg.Petaling, Bidor. Unfortunately the stall close today. Adoyai!! Frust!!

My second choice for dinner was "Nasi Lemak Kukus" near by basketball court somewhere in Bidor. Tutup jugak!! Adoyai!!

MAK suggested a restaurant called "Nasi Ayam Herbal". Actually, I had tried the "bihun sup", and it was a delicious one.

So, MAK and I went to the restaurant. And these were our choices.

"Nasi Lemak Biasa" for MAK.

"Nasi Timbal with Ayam Goreng" for me.

What makes this restaurant special is their alternative of using "Nyiru" instead of plate. I think I should do that at home. Good for a lazy bum like me. No need to wash the dishes after all. Haha.

What I can say about my meal? It is a must-try food. Delicious.

As for now. PEROT SAYA RASA SANGAT KETAT!!

P/S: "Nyiru" also be recognized as "Tampi". Normally it was made from rattan. Being used in winnowing.

P/S/S: Nyet sudah pulang!! Tidur guna kelambu Nyet!! Kau tue friendly sgt dgn nyamuk Malaria..hehe

P/S/S: Credit to Dya for teaching me how to use watermark. Thanks dear. Love you!

Tag from Eda.

2009-06-15T00:19:00.003+08:00

1. Who tag you?
Eda, mama Aina Dora.

2. Do you like tags?
Yes, I guess. To fulfill my free time. Also to keep updated when actually I have nothing in my mind to write in the blog.

3. If you can have a dream to come true,what would it be?
To become the most happiest person in the world. Also to be the best daughter to my MAK and ABAH.

4. What is your current mood?
Bored. Cannot sleep.

5. What will u do if your crush said he/she adores u to?
Excited!! I'll give him a big hug and a warmth kiss.

6. Will you fall in love with your bestfriend?
Nope!! Eventhough sometimes people said that bestfriend will be the best partner for you.

7. Which will you prefer,loving someone or being loved by someone?
Both of course!!! Adoyai!!

8. What is your favourite food?
Tomyam? Sluurrrpp...

9. If the person you dislike is right in front of you,what will you do?
I will just ignore him/her. Gonna vomit on his/her face.

10. What do you pray each day for your loved ones?
Happiness, great health etc.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?.
10 years in the future? I'll be 33. Wow!! Quite a number. That time I wish I already have my own family. Live my life well with my hubby and the kids.

12. What is the reason that could make you tensed up?
Love and life matters. Sometime study could be the reason too.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tag u is?
Simple, gile2, happy go lucky, outspoken, etc. Maybe, I guess. Because we are haven't meet in real life. Just through internet.

14. Would you rather be a single and rich or married but poor?
Single? Crazy!!, Rich? Yes!!, Married? I want!!, Poor? I hope not!!

15. Would you sacrifice for your loved ones?
Of course I will. The reasonable one please.

16. What's the character must have in your partner?
Caring, love me more than I do, kind-hearted.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously,who would you like to pick?
Iskh!! Don't have answer for this.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that someone has done?forget?
I can forgive. I'll try my best to forget. The scar will still be there somehow, rite?

19. Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?
Both. But in different situations.

20. What is your embarrassing moment?
It were moments actually. I won't mention those in here.

21. Who are the 5 person that you would like to tag?
Dya
Dzul Nyet
Angah
Teha
Jia

Coins

2009-06-14T22:23:00.006+08:00

These 2 weeks just made me tired. Really tired I guess. Exhausted? Yes, that's the word.

I had not enough rest. I slept less than 5 hours per day. My body seems can't take it anymore. As a result, now I had a fever. Very bad one. I can't really get up from bed. Just lying down. I think back massage will be the best idea. My back is so aching.

Opps!! I didn't come to the main point of writing this post. Okay.

I just don't have a job to do in the room. I took all my coins in the red box. Counting all of it. Actually my main purpose is to search for coins which had been produced in year 1983 (LOVE's birth year) and 1986 (my birth year).

I keep all my coins in this red box.

I have RM100++ of coins. And guess what? I don't get any coin of 1986!! For 1983, I only got 2 pieces of 10cent coins. I told LOVE about that. And guess what LOVE replied? He didn't find the 1986's too. Adoyai!!

I'm confusing rite now. No coins never been produced in 1986?? Hmmm...

Dear..

2009-06-13T19:38:00.004+08:00

I really enjoy reading it.
Paulo Coelho is such a great author in the world.
Thanks a lot The Alchemist.

Poor Nyet..

2009-06-11T22:49:00.009+08:00

Nothing much to be talk.

I woke up a bit early compared to the other days before. With the main purpose to go to visit a friend, Dzul Nyet. He was admitted to Hospital Slim River. Due to his worst fever since last Sunday.

The moment I entered the Ward 5, I looked at the name list of the patient in front of the Ward 5. There was one M. Dzulhelmi Bin M. Khadri, if I'm not mistaken. I got confused. Nyet's father is M.Sukri. Is he the same Dzulhelmi or just another person with the same name as Nyet.

Never mind, I just walked through the partition's of the ward. Then I saw Nyet lying down very weak on the bed. Poor him. I can even noticed the difference on the body figure. I just think that Nyet looked a bit slim as compared to the other day, when we went out on Sasha's birthday.

He is camera shy. Haha.

On the chair next to the bed was Nyet's mom. Nyet is suspected dengue. Poor him. His mom said, Nyet couldn't even eat the lunch meal. Nyet just having some fruits. He said he feels "loya". He cannot take any foods after all. He will surely vomitting all of it some more. He said that he already lost 10kgs for only 5 days. Somehow I think that would be a good alternative to lose my overweight. Haha. No! No! Please. Just kidding. "Simpang malaikat 44".

After an hour "borak" with Nyet, then came up a friend of him, Faiz. Which is also my good friend's beloved.Haha.

As being a good friend, |I had took several photos of Faiz for my good friend. I just candid all those without permission from Faiz of course. Baik kan I? Just for you, sayang. She did thanked me for all the photos. And of course she is very happy to have the current photos of Faiz.

At the back is Faiz. My good friend's beloved one.

I think that's enough for Nyet's update. Get well very soon Nyet!!!

P/S: I bought a chocolate moist cake and some fruits for Nyet. I hope Nyet like those.

An unintended post..

2009-06-11T00:28:00.010+08:00

Good day all. I am actually have zero idea in my mind right now. I just have nothing to be talk and share today. I had been in a hectic weeks. I slept only for three to five hours a day. I am totally exhausted. But still I cannot fall asleep. Just yet.

I am figuring out, what am I gonna do? It is a hell bored staying alone at late night. I just have nothing to do. All I can do is blogging. Surfing for some interesting websites. Watching television? Not interested anymore. Astro just repeat the same programs. I am just too sick of it.

Now, I think I wanna talk about the intended purpose of blogs.

I don't remember when did I start to think that I should have one blog of mine which will be totally manage by me. A very long time ago, I already created one blog. Just for the start. But, that time I have no idea at all of what should I write on my blog. Then, on February 14th this year, I created this blog which turned to be my official blog.

At the beginning stage of blogging, I have no follower at all. But, Dya, my ex-schoolmate, gave me an endless supports to blog. She never forget to keep commenting each of my entry post. I have to admit that she really did inspired me in blogging. Thanks a lot Sayang!!

The main purpose for me in blogging is to improve my English writing skills. I realized that I am very weak in English. In fact I made a lot of grammatical errors in all my previous entries. But I just keep bear in mind, no one will ever judge me on my writing. Well, this is my own blog after all. Freak! This is not an English class.

At first, I just wrote about myself. What did I do everyday? What was happened to me that particular day? I can say that at first blogging for me was just like writing a journal or diary that I made it to be available to the public. It was just the stories of one side of me that I have decided to share with anyone who might be interested to read it.

Sometimes I feel that I blog because to voice my heart out. Which actually I have no one to share what I feel with. I have guts feeling that someone out there would be listening somehow. Sometimes, I just cannot talk to anyone about my feelings for some good reason. So, I just hold it back. But, thankful to the Divine, after I started my blog, I feel much more relief knowing that I have one better medium for me to voice out my feelings. Happiness, sadness, stress, depression or any other feelings.

Recently, I wrote a few entries which actually do not directly implied myself or people surrounded. Okay. Fine. Yes, maybe it is about 30% of it reflects what was actually happened to me. But the other 70%, it is just what I've been thinking of. For that, I've got quite some responses from my readers. They kept asking me if I am in deep critical problem and they even offering me some advices. I do really appreciate those responses.

Yes people, I was in very deep down stress these few weeks. But as I went throughout all that,I just want to throw some opinion of mine. I mean I do interested in talking about love and life. As for this reason, I think I would like to start writing about those two topics. And if I am lucky enough, maybe I can get more responses from all the readers. Then only I will feel that I am blessed enough.

OMG!! I am talking crap. Arghh!! Azie!! Tido!!

P/S: Dya, tomorrow I'll go to visit Nyet. Don't worry. Any update I will definitely texting you. Love you!

He knows the best way to persuade me..

2009-06-10T00:54:00.010+08:00

Having said that our relationship seems didn't goes very well recently. A lot of fights. A lot of tears.

He tried his best to come down here and meet me. With the main purpose to solve all the problems between both of us.

He did called me around 11am and begging me to go out with him. Well, I agree. I bear in mind, sometimes we need to confront the reality. Confront the problems. No need to be hide. Phone calls and messages sometimes cannot be the best medium. Face to face will always be the best one, I think.

After dressing up, I went out. Met him.

To be frank, the first half an hour I just kept silent and didn't even looked at his face. I just stood there like a stone. Until, he went into tears seeing me that way. He said I am not in love with him anymore. That's what makes him more frightened.

After a long paused, he brought up something from his bag. Tadaaa... Sorry, I am wearing the necklace right now. Just the picture of the box.

He said, he did planned to give it to me on my birthday. But something came up and he can't make it on that day. I just accept. Of course with a big smiles on my face. Haha.

Then we went to Kinta City Jaya Jusco. Having a lunch at Johnny's.

Then, another surprise came up. He straight away entered Guess outlet, picked a handbag and paid at cashier. I just don't have any idea about that. But, as what elders said, "rezeki jangan ditolak dan musuh jangan dicari". It's been a while since I bought my last handbag. So, this is just nice. Well, here it is. Opps, I did it again. Forgot to take picture of the handbag. Sorry.

Now, what more can I say about the meeting? He already knows the very best way to persuading me. Whenever I get sulk, we fight, then at last he buy something for me. Mak said, "Selalu lar merajuk, nanti dapat barang baru lagi".

Yes, I have to admit this. Shopping is always be the best therapy for my stress and deppressions.

P/S: Sleepy head in here. Sorry a lot for the school's girl writing again. I am just too tired.

P/S/S: I just realized that I wear the same shirt like the one I already wore at Sasha's birthday. Sorry. Silly me.

Love, fate and destiny.

2009-06-08T02:58:00.003+08:00

Just having heart to heart talks with my best friend. Now, I just cannot get to sleep. Keep thinking. What is actually the meaning of love fate destiny?

I mean like, yes now I am in the middle of love. But still I have no clue if this is my love destiny or not. Skeptical thinking rite?

I did some Googled just now. And this what I found through my chroming.

LOVE: That tumbling, mysterious force that hits you in the face and leaves you in a dark pit of confusion. That feeling that leaves you dazed and light-headed. That feeling that makes you feel everything is right in the world. That feeling that comes with those three little over used words: I LOVE YOU

FATE: You can't run from it. You can't hide from it. What you do, whoever you meet, that's fate. It's a cruel and stern master; deciding everything without your consent. That first chance meeting between two lovers, that’s fate. That shock you find within after you find out you're working together, that’s fate too.

DESTINY: You have to grab it. You can't wait for it to come to you. You decide for yourself what destiny you have. Once you have it, you have to pursue it. You can't stay in one place, waiting for the expected changes to kick in. You have to run after it, fight for it with every inch of your being.

As I go through a love in the real life, I should admit that I have my own opinion towards the meaning of all these bounding words.

LOVE for me sometimes can be good and sometimes can be bad though. When love is in the air, you can feel like fondling. You will feel like the entire world is yours. You will feel like everything turn to be very colorful. All the beautiful lovely flowers seems smiling at you. The wind seems very friendly to touch your skin and blow your hair. You will even feel like living in heaven. Unfortunately, when there is no more love is around, you will feel like the entire world is laughing at you. Looking down at you. You will feel like dying. You will feel the sorrowfulness. You might even think that it is the end of the world.

As for FATE. It is truly something that we couldn't afford to avoid. It decide everything for you. No mercy. Sometimes you might feel like there is no sympathy in fate. You have to accept whatever it is, even though you are not really welcome it. For some lucky times, you will find that fate is actually coming to be friend with you. To bring a little bit of happiness to your life. In order to spice up your life. But we have to always make ourselves to believe that any fate that being given by God, is actually bring along the good purpose behind it. Fate will never harm us.

Last but not least, DESTINY. I can say that it is actually predetermined by God. It is a predetermined course of events. You may choose your own destiny by choosing different paths of your life. You can make it as your best destiny, or even at the contra side. When you choose to follow whatever your destiny will be, everything will also tend to go right in your life. There are some events that are to happen and not to be changeable.

Some people might says, love destiny bring means that two hearts will be drawn and brought together in a love that will never end. Whatever is coming in between, these two hearts will definitely be together forever. These two hearts will never can be separated from each other. If it is ever happen to them, some miracle will always bring them back together again. To live together. To live their life together. Seems that there is a strong binds that already bound them.

And now, to be frank, these three strong bounded words keep hitting me with so many questions.

I have read this quote somewhere, back to a couple years ago.

"True love will never have a happy ending. Because true love will never ends."

Is it true? If it does, then why true love is exist in this world? If it cannot bring us to a happy ending?

After all, we have to admit this. Even though we are loved to be in love, somehow we have to accept the pains that comes along with it.

We are actually taking a risk whenever we open our hearts to allow love to enter it. Because the truth is, if we ever open it for love, we are also expose it to full of pain. We can never be able to open our heart for love and at the same time do not experience some hurt.

TRUE LOVE IS SUICIDE!!

...

2009-06-07T00:05:00.002+08:00

I feel like dying.
And it is for sure the only way I will feel even better.
God, help me.
I am so dying.

Tag from Shiela.

2009-06-06T19:30:00.004+08:00

I was tagged by Shiela, my new blogging friend.
Actually I am very tired rite now.
But still cannot sleep because it's already Maghrib.
While waiting for "senja" to over, I think I can manage to complete this tag.
So, here we go.

hi5

1) "5" nama timangan anda

Azie - The most common nick name for me.
Azua - Normally being used by my school's teachers and lecturer's.
Ajie - My younger sister started to called me Ajie instead of Azie when she was a kid. She just replace the "z" with "j".
Aunty - Addressed by all my nephews and nieces. Now, everyone in the family addressed me as Aunty.
Bb - For LOVE only.

2) "5" sifat or tabiat buruk

Nails bitting - My very bad habit since I was a kid. Now, I can control it. A bit I guess. But, I'll start again if I am in deeply thinking situations. Especially to make very crucial decisions.
Laugh like "pontianak" - I just cannot control this bad habit. Seriously I am not that decent girl type. Haha.
Sleep too late at night - In fact every nights. Eye bags? Don't mention it.
"Gesel2" my foots before I get to sleep - Is it a bad habit? Maybe. Yes, all my girlfriends who been sleep with me might think that I am a "lesbo". No no! I am totally straight.
Gossiping - I loike!!

3) "5" makanan favourite

Bihun Tomyam Extra Spicy - From Restoran Charen, somewhere in Changlun.
Fish - I prefer fish rather than chicken. Nope! It is not about diet. I am just too sick of eating chicken. Muak!
Laksa - Must be original asam laksa. Laksa Johor? Laksa Sarawak? No such thing please.
Rendang Ayam - Now, chicken is accepted. But, must be made by MAK.
Black Pepper Lamb - Arghhh!!! Delicious!

4) "5" subjek pelajaran paling suka

Accounts - Of course. I am Accounting student rite? Forget it?
Mathematics - The most interesting subjects to be learn.
Chemistry - I love those scientific's names of the molekuls etc.
Audit - I'm Loving it! Influenced by Mr Syahrir I guess.
English - I have to like it in order to improve my English level.

5) "5" lima benda wajib dlm purse

Mykad - To prove that I am Malaysia resident.
Driving License - Important..Important..
Cash money - No money no talk.
ATM cards - Very2 important. I don't have credit cards okay?
Shopping cards - Very3 important. Needed especially there is a "SALE" word.

6) "5" topik yg biasa dibual bersama pasangan or teman

Love and relationship - Happiness and sadness.
Sex - Opppsss!!! It's knowledge.
Gossiping - Especially about "artis".
Old time memories - I miss them all.
Mengumpat?? Yes!! I am very good in that. Haha.

7) "5" mangsa tag

Another anniversary.

2009-06-06T01:49:00.005+08:00

June 6th.
Today is our 11th anniversary??
Woww!!

Yes people, I know. It is quite a number.
But, it's true tho. But still have "on-off" sessions in between that 11 years.
As people always said,
"Sedangkan lidah lagi tergigit"
(Saper suruh gigit lidah?)

I don't really have any idea what I'm gonna talk here regarding my anniversary.
Because...Hmmm...
Nothing to talk. I am totally blank.

So, I really think I want to stop here.
My headache is killing me rite now.
I should sleep. I will continue with another entry about my 11th anniversary later.
Only if there is something really special happens.

Tomorrow is a big day for Abg. Man, my cousin.
He'll become someone's husband.
I have wake up very early in the morning.

Till then, bye.

P/S: Someone said I should put this picture in my blog. So, here I am. The very latest of me. Taken before going to Abg. Man's nikah.

Sasha's 22nd birthday celebration.

2009-06-05T03:01:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was Sasha's birthday.
June 4th.
Dzul Nyet kept asking me out for a cup of coffee,
since we were never meet up for almost 8 years.

He asked me, if I can help him to make something surprise for Sasha's birthday.
How sweet rite?

Owh forgot to mention here.
Nyet and Sasha were once a lovely couple,
back to SMKGR's years.

So, as been planned by Nyet and me, we both met up at KFC, Bidor.
Then we both went to buy a cake.
Asked "Kaduk" favor to keep the ice cream cake,
while we went to fetch Sasha at her house.

Then after kidnapped Sasha,
three of us straight away go to Dunkin Donut, RnR Tapah Selatan.

Happy Birthday to you...
Happy Birthday to you...
Happy Birthday to Sasha...
Happy Birthday to you...

Our foods.
We were having croissants with chicken ham (i guess),
6 pieces of multi flavors donuts,
iced latte for me and Dzul Nyet,
and 100plus for Sha the birthday girl.
All sponsored by "Kaduk", a boyfie for my younger sister.
Thank you Kaduk!!

But, not forget the ice cream cake sponsored by Dzul Nyet.
The cake was made from Kedai Kek Pertama, Bidor.
(Tu jer yg ader kat Bidor nie haaa...
Secret Recipe takde pulak plan nak buat outlet kat sini)

Si Nyet seriously cannot wait any seconds more.
He kept staring at the foods.

"Makan itu indah"
That is his favorite slogan.

Sasha with her "jambul".
Seriously, she just looked like the same Sasha back to SMKGR's time.
She will always keep trying to maintain the "tudung",
so that her "jambul" will never come out.

With Nyet.
Nyet said,
"Seriously, rupa hang lain giler drpd mase sekolah dulu".
Haha. I don't have idea where is the different.
Owh yes,
one thing for sure.
My body weight.
Waaaayyyy more fatter than the old Azie's.

P/S: Sorry for the "school girl" style of writing.
I am just too sleepy rite now.
I need to zzzzz...
Nite all.

P/S/S: Real name for Kaduk is Firdaus. Haha.

Loneliness

2009-06-04T03:53:00.004+08:00

I just feel lonely. Really lonely.
I am all alone by myself right now.

Even though everyone is around.
Making jokes that never gonna stop.
Laughter is everywhere.
Love is in the air.

But sometimes I can feel there is a huge hole in my heart.
I can feel that I was thrown far away from this whole world.
I can feel the loneliness lingers in my heart.

Sometimes I keep thinking again and again.
Am I being appreciated?
Am I being needed?
Am I being loved?

I really wish that I could disappear into the thin air.
And then wait and see if I am being missed.
Am I?
Is there anyone who will missed me?
By any way?

I guess the answer is no.
Never.
So...Hmmm..

Is it true that this situation exist in this world?

2009-06-03T02:54:00.006+08:00

I am so bored. Doing nothing at home.

It is 3.09am. I am still awake. Cannot close my eyes. Just having a girl's talk with El, my girlfriend.

What else can I do? In the middle of a night. Or maybe I can say, in the very early morning. Haha.

I came across this entry, while I blogging through a few blogs. I don't have any idea who is the owner. But still I am attracted to read her entry.

In her entry, she pointed out about this question.

"Have you ever meet your soul mate after you already met someone?"

Frankly says, I am seriously never ever heard about this before. In real world. Yes, I did read through all the stories. But all of that were from a couple novels. Nothing to do with the real world. So, before this I just think that it all from fantasy. From imaginations.

Here I put the full entry from her blog.

You already met someone.Stung by love.He's all you're looking for.He takes care of you,adore you,accepting you as who you are,shared everything together and you even told your self-damn he's the ONE.And the step towards the great happy ending is not even something you'd call 'looking forward to it' anymore but its already there.Right in front of your eyes.

And suddenly there is HE is.
Another person jump into the picture and create another electricity sparks.At first you just think gosh he's hot;
"Oh I like that too~~!";
"Hey,thanks for being such a great listener";

...then after some conversations,companies and sharing thoughts;you began to wonder;you two had so much things in common-where have u been all this while?Why don't you come earlier?Hmm.....

From the fancy;you began to adore.

From calling each other buddy;he began to call you honey.

From a "just to say hi" text messages;it went to "missing you".

From saving his number as the member of 'BFF' group in your cellphone; he's now on your top list of speed dial.

From sharing hobbies and interests you guys now talking thru some love song lyrics.

There's also a vow like "If by 40years old we're both single;lets get married"
And from the sayings of "I'll definitely take leave to attend your wedding" suddenly he said "Why you dunt see me 1st?,why u have to have him?"

And that's where u got stucked.
One is surely love you unconditionally and without doubts will be a great father to your kids;
The other one is the type that you would kill to marry.Or even date.

Which way would you go?

For real babe. I don't think that there is a person who is getting stuck in between this kind of situation. If there is one, I am figuring out of how he/she gonna cope with this situation? Seriously, it is a damn situation. Where you have to kick your ass and make one best decision.

And the most important, the whatever decision he/she is going to make, must always be with the purpose to makes everyone happy. It is impossible rite? Because it is for sure that one heart will be hurt.

If you decide to choose to be with A, then B will get hurt.
If you decide to choose B as your life partner, definitely A will get hurt.
Or else you choose to leave both A and B. And you become the one who will getting hurt.

I couldn't think any further, because I've never been in that kind of situation. And of course I don't want to experience it. For real babe. Crazy!!!

Saya sayang kamu semua!!!

2009-06-03T00:29:00.002+08:00

A-tong, Dya and Achik.

Si Gemoks and Dee.
It is a bit blurry picture. But I like it.
Sorry Dee. Hehe..

We were having so much fun together!!!
I love you girls!!!
So much!!!

RESULT IS OUT??

2009-06-02T22:57:00.005+08:00

I just checked my last semester's result.

What I can say about it? Hmmm... Syukur. I got a flying colors result? Naaahhh!!! I only got an "okay" result.

But my "cgpa" decreasing a bit. Maybe because of my PSA paper. So "hampeh"!

But i accept it with all my heart. As mom always said. "Kita akan dapat apa yang kita usaha".

I do happy knowing that all account's subjects are okay. Because I had a very hard and difficult times answering all the papers back to last semester final exam.

After all, syukur. Alhamdulillah....

I must be crazy..

2009-06-01T03:48:00.000+08:00

I am start to feel bad again. So bad.

Men are good at sulking?

2009-05-31T01:02:00.003+08:00

While watching a Malay drama "Kerana Kasih" at TV3 with family, the actress said something about sulking. I didn't really followed the whole story. Me and sisters were busying gossips and laughing.

There was something about the actor who get sulk with his wife.

Now, I start to think again. Do men get sulk? Of course. It is a normal behavior for a human being like us. But still, I think that it is not really normal for men to get sulk. Well, men always try to be really macho, cool and steady. Especially in front of girls. It is a fact rite?

If I looked back into my 23rd years of life, I can agree at the statement that men do sulk. So silly.

In fact, I think men sulk a lot more than women. Maybe I can admit that men are good at sulking. I've known a quite number of men who basically go into a sulk. And the worst part is they won't talk to you for a couple days. Maybe when they feel annoyed with you. Or maybe when they can't get their own way. Or maybe when things don't go their own way.

I did googled some websites and forums just now. Especially forums about relationship and marriage life. I came across a research done by Peter Rook. He said,

Yes some men do sulk. But some women mistakenly think a man is having a sulk. This is because when a man gets upset, he never talks about what is bothering him. Instead, he becomes very quiet and goes into his private world. Ladies, this is not a sulk, It's our way of trying to find a solution.

Is it true? Or not? Hmm..Then? Whot does sulk means to a guy? After all I need to agree that guys are complicated.

People, please tell me. What is the best way to know that men especially our spouse is sulk? Or in other way, to know that we are the target of a sulk.

In my opinion, the sulker does not really want to get engage an eye contact with us. That's mean, the sulker does not want to look at us when they get sulk with us. In easy words, we are the target of a sulk. This is a very common behavior of a human being. And I will not deny that me too just like that when I sulk.

According to my experiences being in love with LOVE, that is not really easy for me to know that he is sulk. Because he is not an open and outspoken type of guy who easily can talk about how he feels. He likes to hold it back just with himself. It is too difficult for me to know what is on his mind at the moment. And I think I am getting used to it. That's why sometime I don't ask him because I know I will get the same answer. He will says, I'm so ok B.

Most of the time when I noticed that he was sulking, I will find my own way to overcome it. I think touching will do. Also make him laugh. It is a stupid action for me to think that I can just ignore the sulker and just go away.

Sometimes I think sulking might show childish behavior. But some might says, men don't sulk for no reason. Is that true?

Above all of that, I can say that sulking underminds and might hurts your partner by any way.

So, do not get sulk. Boleh? Hahahaha...

Welcome to my newly designed blog

2009-05-29T03:03:00.006+08:00

I am now in Puchong. With the main purpose to take my lil nephew back to hometown. He insisted to spend the upcoming school holiday at Kg. I am so excited because it was almost half a year I didn't have much time to really play with him. Yes, he is my favourite nephew. I stayed with my ABANG back to 6 years ago if I am not mistaken. Somewhere in Pandan.

I have no other activity to do now. Everybody are sleeping at the moment. As usual, I cannot easily get to sleep. I was intended to change my blog template before. I just want to find something really suit myself. I love cute thingy.

Luckily, after rolled over a few free blog template websites, I finally found this cute design.

I choosed this template design because of the cute birdie image. Also the flowers all over the blog. I think it is simple yet nice design. Not really too messy to my eyes. The plain color also really make me feel much more relax whenever I open my blog.

I've been through a saddest moment when I uploaded the template and saw all my widgets gone. I managed to do all as before. Now, everything is back to normal. No worries.

It is a new, cute blog template design. And looks like it should be a very exciting one. I hope it can encourage me in writing. Yes, I admit that I have been terrible with all my previous entries. With the intention to improve my art of writing, I hope I can do way better after this.

I feel sleepy now. Time to sleep. Nite all.

BEST THERAPY

2009-05-27T16:46:00.008+08:00

Yesterday, I went to Ipoh. Be a proxy for ABAH's company. Attended a "Seminar Peningkatan Pemahaman Program Kontraktor" by CIDB. It held at Casurina Hotel. From 8am until 4pm.

What I can say about the "seminar"? I think I have nothing to say because I didn't really give full attention. What do u guys expect? I know nothing about construction. I am an Accounting student. It was a very bored "seminar" for me. I spent all the time with reading my "P.S. I love you" novel, for my 2nd time/round reading it.

2hours for lunch break were given to all the participants (majority middle aged men). We were served with delicious meals for lunch. But I didn't enjoy it because I was a little bit shy, surrounded with old men. As a solution, I just eat two spoons of mixed vege. That's it.

I went back to my car. Started the engine, turn on the air-cond, then zzzz... About half an hour, I woke up. Heard a noise from a few guys just beside my car. S**t.

It only left about one hour and thirty minutes more. I made up my mind. Drove my car, heading Kinta City Jaya Jusco.

I parked my car at the roof top.

That time, what was in my mind just take a walk and enjoy window shopping. But...My eyes captured the word in front of VINCCI outlet. It was "SALE". OMG!!!! Up to 50% off!!! I bought only 2pairs from VINCCI. Too many people, and I was not really in the mood to "rebut2".

I went to the 2nd level. "SALE" word again. This time at NOSE. I tried several shoes. Looked at my watch. It was 2.20pm. Only left 10 minutes more for lunch break. Without wasting my time, I grabbed 3pairs of shoes and paid up at the cashier.

I just cannot control myself. I was only intended to have a window shopping. But again. It was ended up with 5pairs of shoes clung on my both hands.

And I felt much more better after that. Well, I have been not in good mood these few days. So, I can make a conclusion here. Shopping is always be the best therapy for me.

P/S: Exactly! I love shoes!

I HAVE NO IDEA FOR THE TITLE.

2009-05-26T18:11:00.006+08:00

I was not in a good mood recently. I talked less. No laughing. No joking. No smiling. I was too lazy to picking up calls. I was too tired to replying all the messages. When people asked why I looked so sad, then I replied "takde pape, tak sihat sangat." Then, I gave them a truly fake smiles.

Me, myself also don't understand what actually happened to me. Silly me. Clearly all the problems were from my own self. I was the one who likes to think more and more. Deeper and deeper. And it hurting me so much.

I feel lonely. My heart feels lonely. I just need some space to think. To really searching the answers for all the questions in my mind. Looking back to my entire life. I really want to cry my heart out. Crying really can relieve my pain. And yes. I did it. So many times. And I felt better.

I am figuring out. Why people being too cruel to one another? Why people do things that can hurt others' feelings?

I've been read this, "Hearts are just like crystals. Once broken, we can never make it right again. Never." I do understand the meanings as I did digested it. But still, I think, we, human being do not really bother about this. Including me. Sometimes I did hurts others when I never have an intention to do so. And I feel bad for that. Sorry.

After all, I think I should put all the blames on my shoulders. I must say this. Yes people, I AM A BAD GIRL.

TUGAS TAG

2009-05-25T12:15:00.009+08:00

I was tagged by Dya. I just love to do any tag task since I have no other activity to do at home.

1.Adakah anda rasa anda hot ?
Hot? Because of the weather. (Hot=panas kan...haha)

2.Upload gambar kegemaran anda..

3. Kenapa anda suka gambar ni?
Captured by Dayah Lodi... Just a candid photo but it turned too something symbolic..I just live inside the box without having any courage to do something extraordinary or outside the box...hmmm...

4.Bilakah kali terakhir anda makan pizza?
A month ago if I'm not mistaken. With LOVE and Uzman.

5.Lagu terakhir anda dengar?
Love Story by Taylor Swift

6.Apa anda sedang buat selain buat tag ni?
YM with Diana and Kak Ayu. Girl's stuff.

7.Selain nama anda, apakah lagi nama yang orang panggil anda?
Family usually address me as Aunty. LOVE called me BB. Gang from KMPH called me Azues sometime. Some good friends in UUM called me Jah (Jahat kan..haha)

8.Tag 5 orang

Dzul
Hany Bany
Teha
Mama Eda
Ekin

Siapa no.1?
My good old days friend. From SMKGR.

Siapa pula no2?
A good friend from UUM. She is just a small girl. But has a big mouth. Loves to talk and talk and talk.

Orang no 3 ada hubungan dengan siapa?
Teha? With her beloved hubby lar of course. And also her two cute kids.

Bagaimana pula dengan no 4?
Mama Eda is my blogging friend. Who currently live in Aussie with her hubby and her cute lil Dora.

Katakan sesuatu tentang no 5?
Ekin is Lean's pet sister. Currently studying in Shah Alam. And she is from Sarawak I guess.

Senaraikan 5 hadiah yg anda impikan?

1) A brand new lappy
2) Digital camera
3) Myvi SE-Tangerine Orange
4) Flight ticket to Italy + pocket money
5) Just a nice small surprise

Alasan terhadap pilihan tersebut

1) Battery for my current lappy is "kong"
2) To replace my lost one
3) I just loved the colour. So cute.
4) I heard that it is the most romantic place.
5) I need to feel the love.

5 impresi terhadap orang yang diminati:

1) Romantic
2) Kind-hearted
3) Generous
4) Good looking
5) Caring

5 ciptaan yang paling disukai:

1) God's creatures
2) Internet
3) Girl's stuffs-shoes, handbag, clothes, pants etc.
4) Money
5) Car

5 perkara yang dibenci

1) Selfish person
2) Backstabber
3) Certain drinks-soy, milk, air tebu etc
4) Pet
5) Dirty toilet..Yakkss

BIRTHDAY EXPECTATIONS

2009-05-24T16:28:00.010+08:00

I don't know how to begin this. I am thinking if am I too demanding to write all my wish lists and expectations. Or I am just a bad girl who doesn't know how to appreciate everything and at the same time wanting more and more.

Every year, whenever my birthday coming up, I start to feel really anxious. I just cannot help it, the truth is I will always get anxious. The worst part is I will get stress out about anything regarding my coming birthday when actually nothing will happen at all. I always put high expectations of how my day is suppose to go. Or maybe how amazing it will be on my birthday. The main point is I must say that my birthday is a day with a great anxiety and stress.

When the day has comes, nothing will happen. Maybe some of my expectations might be fulfill. And the most of it do not happen at all. Not even happen with how I expect it to be. I had been experienced this kind of feelings throughout the years. The birthday expectations' lists are always letting me down. It always frustrating me.

This situation repeatedly happened this year, on my 23rd birthday. None of my hopes are actually happen today. None of it. Now, I started to think, maybe I should stop dreaming. Maybe I should just giving up all to the fate. Maybe I should not expect too much. Maybe I should find another way to makes me happy. Maybe I should communicate all of these stupid feelings to someone, somewhere.

There are many thing expected by a girl like me on our birthday. Yes, I admit, birthday is one of the day with too much expectations. Even though deep inside my heart forcing me to stop expecting and dreaming. I just cannot do that. For me, the most important is I just want my big day to be appreciated. With so much hype and not just let it over with nothing to be remember. I want my day to be the greatest day ever. I want my day to be a day which can bring an endless smiles on my face. I want my day to be something that I can proudly tell to all of my good friends. I want to show off to the whole world. Yes, so what? I don't think it is a crime for me to show off about my own birthday rite. Furthermore, it is my day. My own day.

I don't really fancy the idea of having a very big, grand and marvelous party that definitely needs a lot of money to be spend on it. I just need something really sweet which I can see the efforts on it. I just need something that can show me the love. I want to feel the love. I want to feel the excitement. I want to feel the attention. I just want it all.

As for LOVE, I am dying hoping a little bit efforts from him. I don't really expect for him to ride a white horse and picking me out to the fairy tales world. It is too ridiculous for me to expect that much. I always hope that I can spend my birthday with him. Only him. I want him to surprise me with something that can turned me out into tears. I want to treat me like I am the princess of the day. I want to be loved. I want to feel that I am loved. Is it fair for me to expect these from him?

I feel really lucky if he can remembers my birthday. And of course I will be super lucky if he gives me a card. I prefer something to keep even though it is just a simple plain card. It is more than enough for me. I don't say that I hate wishes. I just think that wishes is something I can't really keep. Something I can't remember. After all wishes are intangible rite? cannot be seen.

Apart from all of these, there is something that makes me smile every year. The love from my precious beloved family. They are never forget my big day. Especially MAK. She will put so much efforts to makes me happy on my big day. She will stay up late at night just to wish me a "Happy Birthday". It is not easy for older person like her to stay up too late at night. She will make a small family party to celebrate my birthday. She will cooks all of my favorite foods. She will cuddles me. She will never tired to keep telling about my childhood days stories to all of my family. Yes, I am really lucky.

Also, I want to thank to all of my friends. They are never forget to wish me even though I realized that I am kind of bad friend who can't even remember all of my friends' birthday. Maybe I should write down all of their days on one book. A book that can remind me not to forget to wish on their days. I don't think that save it an the hand phone is a good idea. I tried it before but seems it doesn't work. Since I just like to change my hp frequently.

I would like to finish this post with thank to everyone. Thank you for all the wishes. Thank you very much for the thoughts. Thank you very very much for the loves.

P/S: Sorry for all the grammatical errors. I just not feeling good now.

My 23rd birthday!!!

2009-05-24T12:19:00.006+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Enough said.

CIK ZIZEE BACK ON TRACK!!

2009-05-24T11:36:00.002+08:00

It has been ages since my last post.
Semester break just started couple weeks ago.
I spent most of my holiday at home.

Doing nothing. Too bored.
ABAH terminated the streamix.

With the reason that no one using it
since my younger sister continue her study in Masterskills.
And that is the strong reason why I didn't blogging for a while.

So, now I start to update my blog again.
What I'm gonna write today?
Hmmm...

I'll think about it later.
So sleepy.
I just got back from "Pasar Ahad" at my hometown.
Accompanied MAK.
(Mandi awal pagi I arini...hehe)

Let's continue sleeping.
I will continue writing after I get enough sleep.
Zzzz...

CAN I?

2009-04-29T05:12:00.006+08:00

I am just thinking.
Can I really manage to get my old body figure??
Can I really control my appetite?
Can I really control my bad habit of eating and eating and eating?
Can I get rid of my non-stop eating habit?
Can I discipline myself for not taking all the non-healthy food?
Can I???

I want to be just like my old good days.
Wear everything I wanna wear.
Without even bother about my tummy, arms, legs.
I just can get my self with an up-to-date fashion.

I want my "S-size" body back!!!!

Yes people.
It is too annoying to look at my "syok-sendiri" pictures?
I took these pictures using my 1st lappy.
Internal webcam.
So, obviously I was just "syok-sendiri".
Smiled to the lappy screen.
There are still a lot of pictures in my lappy.
Better not for me to upload all of it here.
For some good reason.
(risau u guys muntah darah lak kan..)

P/S: Abaikan environment belakang tue.
My roomate's place.
Buruks kan hostel UUM.
Shhhh...

THE LATEST ME..

2009-04-28T04:03:00.003+08:00

Here I put some photos of mine.
I took these photos yesterday.
Requested by LOVE.
He wanted to see the latest me,
since we haven't meet for almost a month.
I am just too busy preparing for my final exam.

After I took all of these photos,
only then I realized that my skin color is getting darker.
The black circle around my eyes. Sucks!!!
My hair? Sucks!!
My body figure???
Not gonna talk about my body here.
Seriously. I hate to see myself now.
I ate everything.
I took so many junk foods while I am studying.
My stomach seem "bocor".
(Nak makaaaaannnn jer..)

Well, yeah.
I should blame myself.
I am just too busying and focusing most of my time for my final exam.
Till I forget to take care of myself.

I wanna says sorry.
In fact, very sorry.
To my face.
To my hair.
To my skin.
To my body.
To LOVE.
To MAK n ABAH.
To MYSELF!

I promise.
After I finish all my papers,
I will take a very good care of myself.

But, after all I realize.
I must not really blaming myself.
I am studying. It is for my bright future.
I have to catch up everything.
I have to maintain my pointer.
I only have 2 semesters to go.
My study is not a waste!
Hehe...

TAGGING TASK BY MAMA-EDA

2009-04-28T00:24:00.022+08:00

I was tagged by Mama-Eda.
My new blogger friend from Melbourne, Australia.
Actually I just like to visit her blog to see her daughter, Dora, face. Sooo cute...

A. Snap a picture of both inner and outer of your purse.

B. Introduce your purse's brand, price and where you bought it.

BRAND: SEED
PRICE: Around RM100++ (I can't really remember..Sorry)
BOUGHT AT: Jaya Jusco Bandar Perda, Penang.

C: Take whatever from inside your purse.

My "isi-minyak-kereta" cards
1. Mesra - Use at Petronas
2. Bonuslink - Use at Shell

My Touch n Go cards
"Tamak" me. Got 2 cards!!
Useful especialy going back hometown.
So annoying to queue at the "tol".

My shopping cards
1. TESCO Clubcard - Sub-card from LOVE
2. JUSCO - I hate the design. Can't wait to change it next year.
3. Hot Market & S&M Jewellery Privelege Card - randomly use.
4. POPULAR Card - Just sebscribed as a member back to 1 month ago.
5. SUBZERO - I just love to shop at SUBZERO!!
6. PADINI - Stole from my ADIK. Haha.
7. Wei Wei VIP card - Use it to do my facial treatment.
8. Silverho - I like to buy "comel2" stuff from Living Cabin.

My Starter Packs
I just dont know where is my celcom starter pack.
Might be inside LOVE's wallet.

My Student's cards
1. Kolej Matrikulasi Pahang - See? I wear a "tudung"!!
My lecturer insisted all of muslim's girls
in his class to wear a "tudung".
2. Universiti Utara Malaysia - I am currently studying here.
This card also be used as my atm card for Bank Islam.
All the PTPTN loan will be deposit thru BIMB.
So. Obviously it is an important card to me.

My Very-Very Important Cards (VVIC)1. MyKad - Gemoks!!
2. Driving License - Class B2 and D
P/S: I put these cards together at 1 partition.
(Easy if kene tahan ngan encik polis)

My Clinic's Card
Poliklinik Dr. Azhar & Rakan-Rakan
Useful when I get sick. Huhu.
It is one of the most famous clinic in Kedah.

Business and Contact's Cards
LOVE b-card is the very right one.

ATM Card
Maybankard
IMPORTANT!!!

Things that I put at the display partition
1. SEED card - Got it when I bought the purse.
2. My pic - Really miss my long hair.
3. ABAH's pic - I stole it from my ABAH's car.
I can't find MOM's pic (Pasport size).
4. Memory Card - Remember my damaged pink dgcam?
Luckily the memory card still can be use.
5. Celcom Postpaid Simcard - Love do not settle the bills yet.
So, malas pakai.
6. Maxis Postpaid Simcard - I terminated the line.
(Tak larat bayar bil jugak!)
7. LOVE and me!! - the pic doesn't come out. Grrr...

$$$
ABAH just came by last Sunday.
He went to his golf tournament at Bukit Jambul, Penang.
He managed to came down here.
Miss me kot...hehe...

D. Tag other 7 persons.
LOVE
Dya
Teha
Ghul
Dzul Nyet
Markonah
Hany Bany

E. Comment on your friend's (who tagged you) purse.
Mama-eda's purse is ELLE!
Black colour and I just loved it.
I like to know that it is the purse given by her hubby as their wedding "hantaran".
Sentimental value babe!
No wonder she been using the same purse for over 3years.

HUTANG TAG FROM DYA..

2009-04-27T23:44:00.000+08:00

Dya tagged me again. 100 questions?! BANYAKNYER!!!

001. Real Name:Aziatul Azua Hj Mohd Nor
002. Nickname(s): Azie, Azua, Bb, Aunty, Ajie, Zirafah
003. Age: 23rd by 24th May this year
004. Horoscope: Gemini
005. Male or Female: Female
006. Elementary: SK Bikam
007. Middle School: SM Gunung Rapat, Ipoh and SMK Sungkai
008. High School: Pahang Matriculation College
009. College: University Utara Malaysia
010. Hair color: Natural blonde by Revlon
011. Long or Short: Long
012. Loud or Quiet: Quiet, I also can accept loud at certain times
013. Sweats or Jeans: Jeans
014. Phone or Camera: Both
015. Health Freak: No
016. Drink or Smoke: Neither
017. Do you have a crush on someone: Yes! I do!
018. Eat or Drink: Both
019. Piercings: 6 at left ear and 2 at right ear
020. Tattoos: None
021. Social or Anti-Social: In between
022. Righty or lefty: Both
023. First piercing: Back to my kindergarden years
024. First relationship: 10 years!! Until today remain the same!!
025. First Best Friend: Who ek the first one??
026. First Award: In blogging or what??
027. First Kiss: Secret..hehe
028. First Pet: I hate animals!
029. First Big Vacation: Went with the whole of my family-Songkhla, Thailand.
030. First Love at first sight: current love
031. First Big Birthday: Every year MAK will organize it for me
032. First Surgery: My right hand wrist, back to 2 years ago

This and that
033. First sport you joined: netball
034. Orange or Apple juice: orange juice
035. Rock or Rap: Either
036. Country or Screamo: Neither
037. NSYNC or Backstreet Boys: I LOVE both!
038. Britney spears or Christina Aguilera: Britney Spears
039. Night or Day: Night
040. Sun or Moon: Moon
041. TV or Internet: Both
042. Playstation or xbox: Neither (LOVE loves them both!)
043. Kiss or hug: Both
044. Iguana or turtle: Neither
045. Spider or bee: Bee (cute)
046. Fall or spring: Don't have idea since I never experience it before
047. Limewire or iTunes: Neither
048. Soccer or baseball: Neither

Currently
049. Eating: None
050. Drinking: Mineral water
051. Excitement level: 1
052. I’m about to: Continue studying for Business Law paper
053. Listening to
054. Plan for today: Finish studying Company S/U until chapter 4
055. Waiting for: Rain (So hot in here)
056. Energy Level: 3
057. Thinking of someone: MAK n ABAH. miss them.
058. Want kids?: Of course!!
059. Want to get married?: Definitely
060. When?: Once I ready enough from all aspects. Sorry LOVE.
061. How many kids do you want: 3 Should be enough I guess
062. Any name on the mind: Qaseh
063. What did you want to be when you were little: A lawyer
064. Careers in mind: Businesswoman
065. Mellow future or wild: Mellow
066. Something you would never try: Let my MAK to cry in sadness
067. When do you want to die: Eeee...Scary to think of
068. Lips or Eyes: Lips (LOVE's)
069. Romantic or Funny?: Both
070. Shorter or Taller?: Taller
071. Protective or Caring?: Both
072. Romantic or Spontaneous?: Both
073. Nice Stomach or Nice Arms?: Both
074. Sensitive or Loud?: Sensitive
075. Hook-up or Relationship?: Relationship
076. Trouble Maker or Hesitant?: Neither
077. Muscular or normal: Normal
078. Kissed a stranger: Never!!! Eeeuuuwww!!!
079. Broken a bone: Haven't so far
080. Lost glasses or contacts: Glasses. huhu..
081. Ran away from home: CRAZY!!!
082. Held a gun/knife for self defence: Nope
083. Killed somebody: Never!!
084. Broken some one’s heart: I hope haven't..
085. Had your heart broken: Not gonna tell
086. Been arrested: police?: No
087. Cried when someone died: Yes
088. Liked a friend more than a friend: Yes
Do you believe in
089. Yourself: Of course I am
090. Miracles: It did happened
091. Love at first sight: Definitely
092. Heaven: Yes
093. Santa Claus: No
094. Tooth Fairy: No
095. Kiss in the first date: No! Pervert!
096. Angels: Yes
Answer Truthfully
097. Is there 1 person you want to be with right now?: YES!!
098. Are you seriously happy with where you’re in life now?: Don't have answer fot this
099. Do you believe in God?: Yes
100. Post as 100 truths and tag 10 people: LOVE, Markonah, Ghul, Hany Bany, Teha, Mama-eda and anyone else who interested to answer all these questions.

IT IS KILLING ME

2009-04-23T19:58:00.004+08:00

I haven't blog in a while since I was in final exam mode for these past few weeks. I was so busy preparing for my final exam.It was indeed the most stressing and toughest weeks for me.

I took six papers all together for this semester. But the Business and Professional Communication's paper, I already took the written exam last months. So, that means I will only have 5 more papers to go.

This morning I already sit for my Business Law's exam. I can says it is one of the toughest paper I had ever took. Since I have to memorize a lot of things. The facts, sections, cases, and so many more. But I feels a bit relieve now. I did my best.

Just imagine, the exam started at 8.30am sharp. And finished at 11.30am. I was only put down my pen on 11.25am. Holy S**t!! My right hand was almost cramp!! But I never giving up. I forced myself to not stop writing. As a result, I managed to answer all the questions without even leave any of it in blank.

Now, I am looking forward to prepare my next 4 papers. The next one will on 25th April 2009-Principle of Science Social. Follow by Public Sector Accounting on 26th April 2009. Of course I will put extra efforts on my PSA paper since the Science Social paper is well known as "kacang" paper. (Show-off!!!)

Then, I will have 5days to prepare for another 2 papers. Forensic Accounting's exam will be on 2nd of May 2009. The last but not least is my Company Secretarial Practices' exam on 2009, May 3rd.

Then!!!Balik Kampung!!!ho ho ho!!!Balik Kampung!!!